Faster Redhead's definitions

Goldicocks

A woman who measures the penis size of all her dates so she can provide gory details to her friends.

We nicknamed our friend Goldicocks because she would come back from dates and rate the men's penis size, "this one is too big," "this one is too small," "this one is just right."

by Faster Redhead June 4, 2016

Bastafarian

Someone who supports the legal accomplishments of attorney Michael Avenatti in his quest to prove Trump’s corruption. Avenatti’s mantra is “basta,” which is Italian for enough, making his fans “bastafarians.”

The Bastafarians are encouraged by Michael Avenatti’s derailed and damning tweets.

by Faster Redhead June 6, 2018

harmonicock

An oral sex technique where you slide your mouth up and down on a penis while breathing or speaking into it.

He could never dump his girlfriend because she loved to play the harmonicock.

by Faster Redhead October 7, 2017

Blinkini

When someone who is overweight, jiggly or generally out of shape wears a bikini, causing you to keep blinking your eyes or rub them in disbelief to make the sight go away

On the beach, the woman in the blinkini wobbled to the water, unaware of the incredulous looks she got from the others.

by Faster Redhead March 24, 2017

Presidon't

When you have a President who makes so many bad decisions that you dread hearing the next thing he's done.

Trump's statements about the "fake media", voter fraud, Nordstrom dropping Ivanka clothing and Fredrick Douglass still being alive make him our first Presidon't.

by Faster Redhead February 9, 2017

Bangxiety

The nervousness you get before having sex with a new partner.

Tonight was Bernadette''s third date with Bobby and as she got ready she had a bad case of bangxiety.

by Faster Redhead November 4, 2016