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Dick Onchin's definitions

Hamper Safari

When one makes an expedition through a female’s laundry hamper hunting for a prized and coveted pair of soiled panties to sniff. A hamper safari is truly an adventurous exploration and exciting journey.
The party at the sorority house last night was an absolute hamper safari. My olfactory senses could not have been more satisfied.
by Dick Onchin October 1, 2020
mugGet the Hamper Safarimug.

Snugnutz

A male with undescended testicles or an extremely taut scrotum.
That dude in the shower has snugnutz. It’s like a fine piece of leather.

I was born with snugnutz. They never dropped.
by Dick Onchin November 1, 2020
mugGet the Snugnutzmug.

Masticate My Ass

A more refined and elegant way of saying “eat my ass”. Used by the elite class, members of the upper crust and Hollywood and rumor has it, the royal families of several prominent countries.
Geeves my good man. Have you seen Lady Rose? It’s time for her to masticate my ass.

Masticate my ass. It’s Britney bitch.

It was a long ride back to the estate after a glorious weekend in the Hampton’s so I had the chauffeur pull off at the rest stop and masticate my ass in the back of the Rolls.
by Dick Onchin November 16, 2020
mugGet the Masticate My Assmug.

Hamburger Holed

When the anal sphincter or the vagina has been vigorously railed by the bearer of a horse cock until the lips
or rim resembles a fresh pound of raw ground beef.
As if it was not enough that my uncle cornholed me so hard that my asshole looks like a rare quarter pounder, he rearranged my mom’s guts after dinner and left us both hamburger holed.
by Dick Onchin October 1, 2020
mugGet the Hamburger Holedmug.

Tattered Pink Sheet

When your ass has been railed so long, so deep and so hard, that your asshole that once was a mere tattered pink sleeve turns into a tattered pink sheet and your now prolapsed rectum just hangs out flapping in the breeze like a sheet hung out on a drying line.
He plummeted his man meat deep in my turd cutter and pounded my lower intestine like a janitor plunging a clogged drain. It was a relentless rearrangement to my bowels like no other. While I expected his deep stroking would render me with a tattered pink sleeve, the finish was far more brutal. He unloaded his man curd and I quickly grabbed my hand mirror to admire his finish. To my dismay, there flapping in all its glory was my tattered pink sheet. He called me a whore and left me trying to push it back in.
by Dick Onchin October 30, 2020
mugGet the Tattered Pink Sheetmug.

80 Grit Shit

A brutally painful shit. Akin to shitting an 80 grit sandpaper wrapped turd. Typically leaves the ass busting a rhoid or two.
I need some salve on my ass after that 80 grit shit.

That 80 grit shit tore my ass up raw. Do you have a dab of Prep H?
by Dick Onchin July 11, 2021
mugGet the 80 Grit Shitmug.

Texas Pipe Cleaner

When your girl unexpectedly shoves her finger up your already clinched asshole right as you are about to nut and probes straight to the prostate resulting in an explosive orgasm.
I was rearranging Vicki’s intestines last night and right as I was bouta nut she does a Texas pipe cleaner. Braaaaahhhh I unloaded my sack in that slut.
by Dick Onchin May 2, 2020
mugGet the Texas Pipe Cleanermug.

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