Putrid smelling mud monkeys/bowel movements that slide out like slippery fish after eating nothing but a bounty of seafood for a week. The odor is often so foul that victims mistakenly find the smell delightful and immediately develop mercury poisoning.
Jake: "Dude, don't go in the bathroom for a while. I just had the gnarliest tuna drops."
Sam: "I'm hungry."
Sam: "I'm hungry."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
When an item is jammed so deep and hard into a man's urethra that the opening rips, making the penis look like a snake's tongue.
Roger: "Damn son, your piss is spraying everywhere! You wearing a fan spray nozzle on your weiner or something?"
Jim: "Nah dude, I fell dick first on a screwdriver last night and it gave me a tip splitter."
Jim: "Nah dude, I fell dick first on a screwdriver last night and it gave me a tip splitter."
by CATFOOODS February 11, 2012
A form of painting where a man dips his penis in a quality paint and proceeds to whip his penis around in a circular propeller motion.
Clockwise helicopter splatter tends to result in a more smooth and even coating, while counter-clockwise often results in a more textured and artistic look.
Circumcised penises hold more paint, similar to a longer nap on a paint roller.
Clockwise helicopter splatter tends to result in a more smooth and even coating, while counter-clockwise often results in a more textured and artistic look.
Circumcised penises hold more paint, similar to a longer nap on a paint roller.
Jane: "I really want to paint my room but I forgot to buy brushes. Too bad I don't have a penis, otherwise I would just helicopter splatter all over this motherfucker."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
The moment when a male passes a bowel movement so long that it slaps his scrotum on the way down. It is often necessary that the male stand up in order to accomodate the impressive length and properly birth the entire fecal celebration.
Lance: "What is that brown smudge on the back of your balls?"
Mark: "That's an Anaconda Kiss. I took a dump so huge that I got a free high-five after cutting it with my powerful sphincter."
Mark: "That's an Anaconda Kiss. I took a dump so huge that I got a free high-five after cutting it with my powerful sphincter."
by CATFOOODS September 03, 2013
A connoisseur of smegma who is very skilled in identifying, producing, and harvesting the delicious substance.
Tony: "This wine is bland."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
An early form of paper made by the feces of Ancient Egyptians with flat, long anuses. Their anuses looked similar to that of a dollar or credit card slot of an ATM machine.
Sean: "I hate when people complain about how many trees are killed to make paper. At least we don't have to use Poopyrus."
Travis: "Is your mom Egyptian? Her anus is ugly."
Travis: "Is your mom Egyptian? Her anus is ugly."
by CATFOOODS February 09, 2012
When an individual passes a bowel movement and has no need to wipe because of the toilet paper he or she has been eating.
Mary: "Damnit Todd, that toilet paper is fucking expensive! Stop eating it!"
Todd: "I thought you would like that I am an advocate for the clean sweep. Want some salad?"
Todd: "I thought you would like that I am an advocate for the clean sweep. Want some salad?"
by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012