Definitions by CATFOOODS
Calico Smingsmangs
A variation of the brutal sexually transmitted disease (Smingsmangs) where the functions of the vagina and the anus trade places without physically moving.
Nancy: "Wow Peggy, you have quite a robust queef!"
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."
Peggy: "I would love to take credit for that, but it is actually gas escaping from my rectum. I caught the Calico Smingsmangs while serving time in Vietnam and all of my feces have been oozing from my vagina ever since."
Calico Smingsmangs by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Swahili Chandelier
A sexual technique where a male thrusts his penis through the gauged/stretched earlobes (or any other stretched piercing) of another person.
"My earlobes were stretched to 00 before Randy tried to Swahili Chandelier me. Now I'm at 1" and sport a blowout."
Swahili Chandelier by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Taxidinker
A taxidermy penis of an animal used as a dildo for sexual activities.
Taxidinkers are commonly made from exotic animals such as bears, horses, and dalmatians.
Taxidinkers are commonly made from exotic animals such as bears, horses, and dalmatians.
Robert: "Mom laid the cow penis on the kitchen counter when she was cooking last night instead of throwing it out. Yuck!"
Billy: "Butchers don't give you the penis, Robert... That sounds like a taxidinker if you ask me. Your mom is hot."
Robert: "Shut up, Dad!"
Billy: "Butchers don't give you the penis, Robert... That sounds like a taxidinker if you ask me. Your mom is hot."
Robert: "Shut up, Dad!"
Taxidinker by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Tuna Drops
Putrid smelling mud monkeys/bowel movements that slide out like slippery fish after eating nothing but a bounty of seafood for a week. The odor is often so foul that victims mistakenly find the smell delightful and immediately develop mercury poisoning.
Jake: "Dude, don't go in the bathroom for a while. I just had the gnarliest tuna drops."
Sam: "I'm hungry."
Sam: "I'm hungry."
Tuna Drops by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Smegmatician
A connoisseur of smegma who is very skilled in identifying, producing, and harvesting the delicious substance.
Tony: "This wine is bland."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
Justin: "Good thing you are in the presence of a smegmatician! I have the perfect fresh smegma to pair with this bottle."
Smegmatician by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Mookie Stamps
The marks left behind when an individual delicately presses one's anus against a surface or another person after passing a bowel movement without wiping.
Tyler: "I am never inviting Grandpa over for dinner again. He left mookie stamps all over my bedroom! And where's the dog?!"
Mookie Stamps by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012
Clean Sweep
When an individual passes a bowel movement and has no need to wipe because of the toilet paper he or she has been eating.
Mary: "Damnit Todd, that toilet paper is fucking expensive! Stop eating it!"
Todd: "I thought you would like that I am an advocate for the clean sweep. Want some salad?"
Todd: "I thought you would like that I am an advocate for the clean sweep. Want some salad?"
Clean Sweep by CATFOOODS January 29, 2012