The Bible

The most famous fantasy novel in human history.
The Bible isn't even that good, LOTR is a much better fantasy novel. The Bible is quite stupid and contradicts itself a lot. I think a retard wrote it.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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Sex with a Woman

Similar to masturbation but much better. It's performed by inserting your penis into a woman's vagina.

The vagina is located between the woman's legs. You can't miss it.

by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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Raptor Jesus

Our savior.
Raptor Jesus died for our sins.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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I Have Black Friends

The greatest excuse that racists use to try to make it look like they're not racist.

Apparently having black friends negates any racist thing you say.
Person 1: Yeah, niggers are always stealing things and killing each other. Fuck those niggers!

Person 2: Dude...what's wrong with you?

Person 1: It's okay, I have black friends. I can say this.

Person 2: I don't think it works that way.
by Bloodbath 87 March 08, 2009
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Lost

The greatest show of all time. Actually, the greatest anything of all time. Some people don't like Lost but that's because they're not smart enough to follow the complex storylines.
Pregnant Wife: The baby is coming!

Me: Sorry honey, Lost is on tonight. I don't have time to deal with the baby.

Pregnant Wife: What? Are you serious?!?! Help!

Me: Sorry, nothing takes priority over Lost.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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God

A mean old tyrant who threatens to punish anyone who disobeys him.
God: Do what I say or you will burn in a fire pit after you die.

Religious person: Yes master. You're not a bastard at all.
by Bloodbath 87 March 06, 2009
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