Ae5Ea8's definitions

Costcop

the Costco worker who checks your receipt as you leave

Costcops pretend to confirm what you've bought.

by Ae5Ea8 February 7, 2015

shit list

The short list of people you would feel comfortable talking to while simultaneously dropping a deuce.

I often ponder my shit list in the Starbucks bathroom.

by Ae5Ea8 January 10, 2016

raw cheeking

Combination of "raw dogging" and "butt cheeks," describing the act of using a toilet seat, not your own, without protection. The protection in question is toilet paper to line the seat, just as a condom is the protection in question with respect to raw dogging.

It is appropriate to raw cheek in the bathroom of your Immediate and extended family. How far the circle extends to your friends, however, is unclear at this time. At a best friend's house, it is acceptable to raw cheek. The further you get into the realm of a casual acquaintance, though, the more likely it is that you should use toilet paper to line the toilet seat.

Without exception, it is never appropriate to raw cheek in a restroom open to the public.

The old saw goes: Saturday night raw cheeking leads to Monday morning rash.

by Ae5Ea8 March 9, 2015

fingature

Writing your signature on a trackpad with your finger.

My fingature looks nothing like my real signature.

by Ae5Ea8 April 28, 2015

fartnuckle

A fart so voluminous that after it has been expelled from your system you have to tighten up your belt by at least one buckle.

Fartnuckles are best experienced when they're a total surprise.

You'd think it would be call a "fartbuckle" but it's actually "fartnuckle," with an "n." And to be clear, it's not "fartknuckle" with a "kn." It's just an "n."

For any Game of Thrones fans:
one horn is a fartnuckle, two horns wildlings, three horns White Walkers

by Ae5Ea8 January 18, 2017

Home Depotpourri

The beguiling smell of a Home Depot. The strongest notes are fresh cut lumber, lawn fertilizer, and WD-40.

The ladies seem to dig it when I burn a candle scented with Home Depotpourri.

by Ae5Ea8 October 30, 2015

cartesy

Combination of "courtesy" and "cart," describing the act of letting someone check out in front of you because they only have a few things in their shopping cart.

It is good to practice random acts of cartesy.

by Ae5Ea8 February 20, 2015