Ae5Ea8's definitions

Pist-ot note

When you write on the wrong side of a Post-it note.

Dagummit. Another pist-ot note.

by Ae5Ea8 May 14, 2015

mute salute

"Mute salute" describes a short, loud burst of sound from a student's laptop showing that they were watching a video instead of taking notes. A mute salute correctly causes those around you to infer that you were not paying attention at all and either watching cat videos on Youtube or some ridiculous "FAIL" video on TMZ.

Did you hear Jobob's mute salute in class today?

Yeah, that was a total fail. He's on the teacher's shit list now for sure.

by Ae5Ea8 March 2, 2015

Heisenbro Uncertainty Principle

Combination of "Heisenberg Uncertainty Principle" and "bro." A bro cannot be both a bro and a boyfriend/husband at the same time. If he's with other bros, he acts one way: usually vulgar and rude. If he's with his girlfriend/wife, he acts another way: sweet and charming. He can never act exactly like a bro if he is with both bros and his girlfriend or wife.

One often observes the Heisenbro Uncertainty Principle at weddings.

by Ae5Ea8 March 2, 2015

Fenway Park

A place in a man's mind completely devoid of sexual connotation. The image of this place is used to talk oneself down from an erection. When a man is in a public place and threatened with the onset of an erection, a Code Red is sounded in his mind. There has to be — ever at the ready — a place where his mind goes to that has nothing at all to do with sex. The place has to be familiar and engaging. The attributes of the scene can be as various as each man is unique. The most successful scenes are those so deeply non-sexual that it is nearly certain that no sexual associations can be made. It takes focus, but with some self-control, a man can usually get his shit together before his arousal becomes evident to the outside world.

Hitting a home run over the Green Monster: it's my Fenway Park. The crack of the bat, the cheer of the crowd, the bright lights, perfectly manicured grass...

by Ae5Ea8 April 4, 2015

public hair

a pubic hair gone on a walkabout somewhere quite visible, possibly on one's shirt or stuck behind a piece of Scotch tape

public hair
so wrong, so human, such a personal hygiene foul

by Ae5Ea8 September 6, 2016

the Fred zone

a combination of "friend zone" and "red zone." This is when you are close to going all the way with a woman (i.e., you're close to scoring a touchdown as in being in the "red zone") but she denies you by putting you in the "friend zone."

So have you guys made the beast with two backs yet?

No, bro, I got put in the Fred zone. Our relationship is over.

by Ae5Ea8 February 7, 2015

five second rule

when a male wakes up in the middle of the night and pees in the dark using the sound of splashing water or the side of the bowl as a guide

If you're missing the bowl by less than five seconds, you're OK and don't have to worry about cleaning up after yourself

don't confuse the five second rule with other such rules regarding the safety of food

by Ae5Ea8 October 2, 2016