Ae5Ea8's definitions

unfriend

Derived from "unfriending" someone on Facebook, to "unfriend" somebody in the real world is to stop acknowledging their presence. Instead of looking at them as you pass by, basically you just ignore them as if you had never met them.

Getting unfriended is especially weird when you know somebody by virtue of your participation in a group or team — which normally gives you at least a mild sense of camaraderie — but the person who unfriends you still insists on basically ignoring you.

It's official. JoBob unfriended me. I saw him in the hall yesterday and he didn't even acknowledge that we had ever met.

by Ae5Ea8 April 3, 2015

internot

A slow internet connection, deriving from "internet" and "not."

Not another internot! I'm Netflix binging today, for Chrissakes.

by Ae5Ea8 February 17, 2015

satisfriction

Any sexually gratifying friction performed on oneself or another.

Hey, do you want to come over tonight? We can work on our physics homework to calculate the coefficient of satisfriction between our fiddly bits.

Sorry, I'm not into you that way.
Oh, well, I guess I shall be satisfricting myself.

by Ae5Ea8 February 7, 2015

abromatherapy

when a male enjoys his own bathroom stench

One man's abromatherapy is another man's disgusting stench

by Ae5Ea8 October 24, 2016

Blue Hair

Like blue balls, but it's about your hair
Blue Hair is caused by taking a shower but not washing your hair
...something just doesn't feel complete about it

a case of Blue Hair . . . I feel for you, bro

by Ae5Ea8 May 31, 2017

foggles

Combination of "fogy" (as in a person advanced in years) and "goggles" (as in sunglasses), describing those eternally un-cool wrap-around sunglasses with side windows.

Never in fashion: Crocs, Birkenstocks, safari vests, and foggles.

by Ae5Ea8 March 17, 2015

speed test

Similar to the speed test used to test your internet connection, but this speed test is used to determine which checkout line is moving faster. It involves a snap judgment as to (1) which checkout clerk looks the least likely to encounter a situation in which they have to call the manager, and (2) which customers are least likely to have some sort of problem at checkout.

I used the speed test at Costco and got burned when the line I changed into was actually slower than the line I moved out of.

by Ae5Ea8 April 5, 2015