Definitions by ADHDfidget

Wikipedia 

An online dictionary where anyone in the world can pretend to edit an article and then have it promptly reversed by an administrative editor (AKA wiktator) someone else in the world.
This allows Wikipedia to become a compendium for all the worlds knowledge, assuming the world's only residents are Wikipedia editors.

"ISIS published their complete plans for all their terrorist attacks this coming year on Wikipedia, but a wiktator removed it because it was unsourced."

Wikipedia by ADHDfidget May 3, 2017

wiktatorship 

a wiki that porports to be a dictionary that anyone can edit, but if someone tries, his edit will be promptly reverted by a wiki editor.
This makes the wiki editor feel good about himself.

Wikipedia used to be a good site, but now it's a wiktatorship.

wiktatorship by ADHDfidget May 3, 2017

one-child policy

A Chinese government regulation that limited each family to one kid.
In America, we have TV shows like "19 Kids and Counting" that essentially accomplish the same thing.

It's so weird that the Chinese named it the "one-child policy". They should have named it "The no-sibling-rivalry" policy.
It sounds so much better.

one-child policy by ADHDfidget May 2, 2017

claw machine 

A machine that takes your quarters (ok, dollars) and offers you a shot at picking up anything from a stuffed animal to a smartphone.

Setting: Dave and Busters at the claw machines:
Guy 1:"Closer....Closer....A little to the left.... A bit back.... Perfect! Hit the button!
Guy 2: Hits Button.
Claw Lowers.
Claw Lowers.
Claw Lowers
Claw revolves slightly.
Claw grabs end of doll.
Claw drops doll.
Claw returns empty to the prize chute and makes a big show of open and closing.
Guy 1 and 2: "Fuckfuckfuckfuckfuckfuck......

claw machine by ADHDfidget May 2, 2017

Goodnight Moon 

Arguably the worst children's book ever written.
Especially because it implies something else. Something not meant for children.

"I bought 'Goodnight Moon'. Obviously, it was not the type of moon I hoped for.

Goodnight Moon by ADHDfidget May 2, 2017

Googleception

When malware redirects your searches to a Google look-alike instead of the real thing.

"Thanks to installing Utorrent without unselecting all the checkboxes, My browser crashes when all the following Googleception sites fight over my searches:
search.clearch.com
search.conduit.com
search.zugo.com
www2.mystart.com
mystart.com
bigseekpro.com
bigspeedpro.com
search.esnips.com
search.foxtab.com
search.brothersoft.com
search.softonic.com
search.infospace.com
search.iminent.com
search.facemoods.com
plusnetwork.com
alothome.com
search.alothome.com
search.chatvibes.com
searchnu.com
search.etype.com
searchya.com
int.search-results.com
search.searchcompletion.com
adoresearch.com
searchcore.net
googosearch.info
bar.searchqu.com
search.speedbit.com
search.toggle.com
click.searchnation.net
search.handycafe.com
searchnation.net
video.searchcompletion.com
searchbrowsing.com
search.sweetpacks.com
search.guardi.us
search.sweetim.com
WARNING DO NOT CLICK THESE LINKS!

Googleception by ADHDfidget May 2, 2017

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder 

The way psychiatrists say ADD and ADHD when they want to drug your child

"I'm afraid your child has ADD. I think he should try Ritalin.
"YOU WANNA DRUG MY KID???"
"Madam, you don't understand. The situation's precarious. Your child suffers from Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder."

Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder by ADHDfidget May 2, 2017