Definitions by Uncle Dimma
go scratch yourself
father: son your singing sucks. Let me pay you lessons at LaScala in Milan.
son: Dad, go scratch yourself. let the singing lessons hang themselves. i am proud of my hen-scratching or whatever it is you'd qualify my singing nowadays.
son: Dad, go scratch yourself. let the singing lessons hang themselves. i am proud of my hen-scratching or whatever it is you'd qualify my singing nowadays.
go scratch yourself by Uncle Dimma May 28, 2012
something you've learnt to do so well lately
mother: Joseph, stop interrupting. I don't like this something you've learnt to do so well lately. This habit won't get you anywhere in life.
Joseph: go scratch yourself. I will not stop interrupting, just because you want me to.
Joseph: go scratch yourself. I will not stop interrupting, just because you want me to.
something you've learnt to do so well lately by Uncle Dimma May 28, 2012
kodem koll
a boy comes home from school and starts yelling : Dad, please help me with my chemistry and Latin homework.
father: David, kodem koll, take of your hat and coat, and boots, i might add, then go and wash your hands, have your supper comme du monde, then go to your room and start your homework. And that's when I'll come and help you with said homework. Please behave comme du monde, like normal and civilized people.
father: David, kodem koll, take of your hat and coat, and boots, i might add, then go and wash your hands, have your supper comme du monde, then go to your room and start your homework. And that's when I'll come and help you with said homework. Please behave comme du monde, like normal and civilized people.
kodem koll by Uncle Dimma May 28, 2012
pentoute
boy: Dad does this physics problem that they gave me in class yesterday make any sense to you?
Dad: Lol, S.O.S. Your piece of physics homework doesn't make sense, pentoute. At least to me personally. Would you mind if I take your homework and ask some friends of mine who have contacts at CERN. Maybe they can enlighten me, so afterward I can help you?
Dad: Lol, S.O.S. Your piece of physics homework doesn't make sense, pentoute. At least to me personally. Would you mind if I take your homework and ask some friends of mine who have contacts at CERN. Maybe they can enlighten me, so afterward I can help you?
pentoute by Uncle Dimma May 28, 2012
attach balloons to
a boy comes home from school, goes into his backyard and starts attaching helium balloons to his lawn chair.
his mother comes into the backyard from the house and starts shrieking at him: Adam, what the beep are you doing?.
Adam: can I attach balloons to this lawn chair without being bloody disturbed? I am trying to build an amateur flying machine and turn amateur flying machine building among modern teenagers into a trend. I want modern teenagers to be like Inspector Gadget and maybe, lol, fly away from their computer illiterate.
mother: stop living underwater you stupid devil. now I want you to do your chemistry, and I mean wash the dishes, take out the trash, and the like, not your chemistry homework; you get the idea.
his mother comes into the backyard from the house and starts shrieking at him: Adam, what the beep are you doing?.
Adam: can I attach balloons to this lawn chair without being bloody disturbed? I am trying to build an amateur flying machine and turn amateur flying machine building among modern teenagers into a trend. I want modern teenagers to be like Inspector Gadget and maybe, lol, fly away from their computer illiterate.
mother: stop living underwater you stupid devil. now I want you to do your chemistry, and I mean wash the dishes, take out the trash, and the like, not your chemistry homework; you get the idea.
attach balloons to by Uncle Dimma May 27, 2012
a parking ticket
a Roman Catholic family in a mainly WASP (White Anglo Saxon Protestant) neighborhood comes home from church to find the words "alieni ite domum" (latin phrase meaning strangers go home/strangers are not welcome" scratched into their front door. the father, upon seeing this, says: ah those Confederists again. What a parking ticket. I guess we'll just have to repair the damage, maybe even repaint the door.
a parking ticket by Uncle Dimma May 25, 2012
eat your carrots and broccoli
used instead of the phrase "don't ask too many stupid/irrelevant questions and just do as you are told".
a boy, eating, lol, carrots, brocolli, and other stewed vegetables for breakfast, asks his dad:
boy: dad, why do i have to go to class?
dad: because it's fun, you can socialize with people outside the family circle, George. And you gain knowledge that will later permit you to make something out of yourself. And, please, because I am in a bad mood since yesterday, having gotten a parking ticket. Please eat your carrots and broccoli. Then just pick up your things so I can take you to class.
boy: dad, why do i have to go to class?
dad: because it's fun, you can socialize with people outside the family circle, George. And you gain knowledge that will later permit you to make something out of yourself. And, please, because I am in a bad mood since yesterday, having gotten a parking ticket. Please eat your carrots and broccoli. Then just pick up your things so I can take you to class.
eat your carrots and broccoli by Uncle Dimma May 25, 2012