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Hugh G Rection's definitions

Turd

Generally, a log-shaped piece of shit.
Nevertheless, they are also found in coil-shape, mushroom-cloud shape, and even
loch ness monster shape.
From a country-and-western song: All she left me/ was a turd in the toilet
Unpublished Pink Floyd song: All in all your just/ another turd in the toilet
by Hugh G Rection September 17, 2003
mugGet the Turdmug.

free willy

To take a long-needed crap.
Applies only when healthy, large and consistent turds are expected, accompanied with an emphatic accolade of farts.
Does not apply to limp-wristed quiche diarrheas.
Ladies, will you please excuse me? I'm going to free Willy.

If you don´t eat your All-Bran, you won´t be able to free Willy!
by Hugh G Rection September 19, 2003
mugGet the free willymug.

pam anderson

Late 90's female media celebrity.
Ex-playmate, she had the top-heavy, blond-haired, long-legged tokens of desirability, so that any beer-bellied jerk on the verge of passing out could conventionally blurt out that he would love to pork her, even if he could no longer remember his own name.

Pam's checklist:
a) Botox in her lips
b) Silicon in her boobs
c) Nothing between her ears

The high point of her career was appearing in one of the stupidest tv series ever: Baywatch. She then went on to appear in her own TV series, which was even stupider.
Her lowest point was when the video clip of her banging 15-minute hubby Tommy Lee circulated over the Net.
Her own 15 minutes of fame over, Pam still has the asset of *celebrity* which entitles her to a cameo in The Simpsons and to appear in several episodes of the remake The Love Boat, if its ever remade.
It ain't Pam's fault to be who she is. She's just another packaged product. Its up to you if you swallow her or not.
Bon appetit.
Personally, i used to get a far bigger boner from watching the girl next door.
Pam Anderson's shelf life has already expired.
by Hugh G Rection March 14, 2005
mugGet the pam andersonmug.

captain crunch

The only cereal brand that includes dingleberries. Captain Crunch All-Bran With Dingleberries is very rare and seldom to be found. This is because dingleberries are seasonal (they are more abundant during the hot summer months) and handpicked.
I die for my Captain Crunch with Dingleberries!
by Hugh G Rection May 13, 2005
mugGet the captain crunchmug.

masterbation

The endearing way grade schoolers spell the act of spanking the monkey or fucking Manuela and her 5 sisters
According to ancient myth, masterbation gives you hairy palms
by Hugh G Rection February 18, 2005
mugGet the masterbationmug.

puffies

Said of female nipples that stand out notably.
This is not your usual nipple reacting to cold, but a fat, turgid, pointy, fearless, suck-till-you-drop nipple.
She's got no tits, but she's got an awesome set of puffies!
by Hugh G Rection September 19, 2003
mugGet the puffiesmug.

carpet burn

What you get around your lips, and sometimes on your face, after eating way too much hair pie
I ate Donna's wookie patch for two hours, and i got carpet burn on my face!
by Hugh G Rection January 3, 2006
mugGet the carpet burnmug.

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