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The Turd Car

Any vehicle that attracts cops because of its very sheisty appearance, usually due to under-maintenance. Cops feel that these vehicles typically contain drugs and/or criminals. These vehicles will typically be within the limits of the laws, but still get pulled over just because of their dilapidated appearance.

Turd Cars typically have these characteristics: no rims, rims that do not match, missing hub caps, no hub caps, fading paint job, missing or torn away tint, shakes when you accelerate, bullet holes, cracked windows, shattered windows, missing windows, or just generally look like shit.
(ex.) The Turd Car Driver: "May I asked why you pulled me over, Officer?

Cop: "Because you have a Turd Car!"
The Turd Car by Jacob Sportsman December 13, 2010

The Turd Burglar 

to tie someone up to a pole take all their clothes off and then stick your hand/arm up their nutthole pull ot the poop
then your form it into the shape of a turd...your choice of style then tkae it home freeze it and sell it on ebay
Dude i did The Turd Burglar on Molly the other day. I made 5 thousand dollars on ebay!

butter the turd cutter

you butter the turd cutter before you hit her in the shitter or pump her in the dumper or mow her turd blower
That slut tells me I can do whatever I wanted so I'm gonna butter the turd cutter then meat her bean steamer.

Revenge of the Turd

After a bad break up, to take a huge shit in your lover's toilet & not flush just before abruptly moving out when they're not home.
Jack: "Man, Lisa moved out when I was at work last night. I know I cheated on her but she didn't have to get all 'revenge of the turd on my ass'. Took me 3 flushes! It's on now!"

close encounter of the turd kind 

1. Having a negative experience with a douchebag of a person.

2. When you step on dog poop.

3. When a monkey flings his poop and *wham! splat* catches you.

4. Any doo-related major life experience
"Whooooaaa, dude, I heard you and Ryan yelling at each other all night!" "Yeah, it was a close encounter of the turd kind."

"Hey, why are you dragging your foot and what's that smell?" "Close encounter of the turd kind."

"Damn you evil little monkey, did not expect that close encounter of the turd kind!"

"Shane and I had a close encounter of the turd kind."

Frosting the turd 

The act of taking a shit then turning around and jacking off on the turd causing you to "frost" the turd.
My buddy was frosting the turd last night .