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The man’s scalp is smoothly shaved down using lemon juice, coconut oil, and a half pound of home made butter. He then suits up with his roller skates and sets up his diving board for action, but not before lathering his body from the eyebrows down with molasses syrup for friction and so the scalp is favored as the slippery dome and centerpiece of the malicious act. He then looks his victim straight in the ass while he’s tied face down, rear up squirming for help. The man begins to read the Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs to his victim so they both can regurgitate before things really get started. After a couple chapters, the man deeply lathers the victims ass and genitals. He then sets candles up strategically around the victim in a circle, resembling his very own slippery scalp. He then applies the most flammable substance on earth,chlorine trifluoride, to his neck up the center of his scalp and lights it with the nearest candle! He rollerskates viciously to the diving board and leaps head first into the ass of the victim! At this point they’re both in the most terrible pain of their lives, and will remember this feeling even after death. The diver spins on his head with his toes in the air causing a flaming drill sensation in the asshole and stomach of the victim, leaving a giant bloody hole where his ass used to be. He then rubs sardine infested cream cheese in his face, and repeats the entire act until the victim has just barely a head remaining.
Poor Joey fell victim to the dive, he didn’t deserve that.... nobody does.
The Dive by TheManShomDom September 21, 2018
The most awesome band ever, formerly known as Dive Bella Dive.

They still have a tendancy to sing about alcohol and prostitutes (mainly prostitutes), despite the name change and drive around in a riot van which they then spray painted grey because they got chased by the police

Barnaby Courtney - Singer
Dan Scotty - Bass
Sam Battle - Guitar (also has a habit of making music from gameboys and by torturing furbys)
fuuuccckkkk i love the dive
When a "crack addict" takes a shit, and is out of crack so he/she reaches into the toilet and picks apart her/his feces in order to get the morsels of leftover crack and re-use them.
Guy 1: "Yo where's Matty? I got some dope shit he should try"
Guy 2: "Aw fuck man you just missed him, he went to the bathroom. Probably in there getting ready to do the dive"
The dive by TheNewt June 14, 2019

dutch oven on the dive 

When a man muff diving on his lady and she rips some serious ass and holds the covers around his head while he is still down there.
Bobby: "Ricky why do you look so nauseous?"
Ricky: "I just ate out Carmela and she dutch ovened me while I was on the dive."

Sally: "Carmela why are you smiling?"
Carmela: "I gave Ricky a dutch oven on the dive last night."

accept the dive 

When u finally decide to go to that pussy

The Stage Dive

Whilst the man is masturbating he lies a woman down in front of him (preferably in a large area) and begins a run up, the aim is to ejaculate just as he dives over the woman,
Thus a stage dive...

This can also become an Air Raid
Guy: Woah - I got Stage Dived last night

Gal: Thats Gay isn't it?

Guy: No! we started The Stage Dive Olympics in my back yard...

Gal: Can i try it?

Guy: Do you have a Penis?

Gal: NO WTF!

Guy: Then What do you think...?

Gal: Damn!
The Stage Dive by kymmy babes 2 April 21, 2009