Skip to main content

thank you please 

Does your tail pop out when you think rude things?
Mine does

Two Cheese “Thank You Please”

When you eat a full bag of Doritos and finger a girl’s butthole.
“Dude, I just tried the Two Cheese “Thank You Please”!

Mr. Two-Squeeze Thank-You-Please 

An individual with low stamina when called upon to perform a hot carl, a Cincinnati bowtie or a similar act involving defecation on another person for one or both parties’ gratification. Generally it indicates that the person (Mister) can only squeeze their bowels twice (two squeeze) before completing the act (thank you please), which is considered unimpressive, disappointing and, in some circumstances, embarrassing. It’s comparable to a one-pump chump or ‘Mr. Wham-Bam-Thank-You-Maam’.

First heard in the 2013 film Movie 43.
“Drinks are cool. Have a few fuckin drinks. Makes you last longer!”
“‘Last longer’??”
“You don’t wanna be Mr. Two-Squeeze Thank-You-Please, right?”
“Oh, you definitely don’t wanna be that.”

Please and Thank You 

A rude, passive-aggressive amendment, usually found at the end of a imperative sentence, that lets someone know that they will do as you ask. This will typically be learned by administrators, and mangers, working among subordinates or anyone they disdain, because being polite is HR appropriate, but it must be understood that they are peasants. It is implied that while the request is voluntary (i.e. please), the result can be assumed (i.e. thank you), because a peasant has no choice.

*This is especially common in the industry (e.g. restaurants, hotels, retail, etc).
Vince, can you get table 3 a refill on diet cola. Please and thank you!

Thank you, please 

When you thank someone for something they haven't done yet, usually in an annoying sing-songy voice
Make sure you get the seedless watermelon. Thank you, please.

Hey babe, can you hand me that roll toilet paper? Thank you, pleeeease.
Thank you, please by picagirl January 4, 2023

Please and Thank You 

Saying or writing "Please and thank you" at the end of a request can be a sensible shorthand between an aging parent and a loving son, daughter or grandchild. The more old people depend on the busy young, the more important it is for the elderly not to waste time with extended exchanges so 'please and thank you' is an assumption, based on previous familial knowledge, that a simple request will be carried out without requiring a reply.
"Hi darling - could you pick up a book from the library - please and thank you - luvmum" to which the usual reply is "Yup, can do . . . luv" Two short emails, no time wasted and a request fulfilled. If all dealings with the elderly were as simple and as kind, it would be a happier world.
Please and Thank You by MaggieG February 27, 2017