a disorder whereby a
person has recurring thoughts about breaking wind in crowded and, often times, confined places (This is a dangerous situation in which the
person in question is on the verge of becoming a sphincter Sinatra if he/she does not receive professional help or, at the very least, a bitch
slap by his/her friends.)
Paratrooper: Sarge, I know it’s not the
time but I keep thinking about plantin’ some
onion.
Jumpmaster: GOT DAMN IT!!! Ya better at-ease those flatusidal tendencies or I’ll toss your
goat-smellin’ ass off this bird right now, green light or not.