Not your grandpa's skis. Strap a pair of these greased up snow hogs on your feet and you will know deep in your loins what it means to be a renegade demigod flying straight out of hell and down the slopes. "When did I grow a porn stache, and why is there an overwhelming mane of diamond plated mullet streaming off my skull?" you will ask yourself. but then you hear it...that angelic whine that can only be Van Halen's "Running With the Devil" playing on repeat inside your head..emanating from every pore on your body in an awesome wave.
Skier 1: "I wouldn't strap on those Slick Rickys brah "
Skier 2: *straps on Slick Rickys* "Brah it's fine, they're just norma-RUUUNNNIIN WITH THE DEVIIIIIIIIL"
“Whether you call them trains, choo-choos, snake monsters, stiff Rickys, ground yachts, or chugga chuggas, these traveling death traps indeed touch all of our lives.”