When Complainer-in-
Chief's compulsive need for continuous media attention causes him to then claim: 1. The media is the "Enemy of the
People" and out to smear my "good" name, 2. He is the victim of someone he hired/nominated, 3. He is the victim of some hot mess or drama he created, 4. He is "The only one" able to fix anything and everything wrong in
America then hurls blame in every other direction when he can't.
Stay tuned for more on this breaking story "Munchausen by Presidency"... WH reports fire in West Wing...man seen here holding large hose between legs - apparently dousing flames, single-handedly extinguishing
blaze. "White House goes down in flames" Drone footage someone hiding behind South Lawn shed, digging, 2 gas cans seen nearby. Perp seen fleeing in pink robe, flat
orange beret. Another in 5" pumps.
WH tweet "Using very large hands, and huuuge hose, to extinguish very hot fire, huuge flames - sizzingling, bigly, very
hot flames." Smoke alarms blare like copter blades in newly-released 9-1-1 recording, man bellowing, "House was on fire..it was. It's out now. I am the only one who can extinguish a fire this size. It was uuuuuuge. I can put it out though. I did it ...by myself. I'm very strong. Flames fear me. Not like last resident. Most
people don't know how thick my hose is. It pumps enough to douse any sized flame. There was one I couldn't put out easily myself though; it was
hot...some say I am
hot! ...I won't argue. A bright
orange nest of hairspray landed on me. All of my dear friends arrived just in
time...they extinguished that one - wasn't very big. Very special
people --
porn stars. Always there when I need a leak... I mean, a hand. Wait...ok good talking to you. Breaking FoxNews coming on now - gotta go watch"