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pitchforks and hammer handles 

That's what we would say during a downpour.
It's raining "pitchforks and hammer handles". Maybe that was just a local Pennsylvania Dutch area thing.

pitchforks and knives

When one kicks another when down. When life is tough and you express it to someone so that someone makes it tougher.
Olivia told Mark she saw her grandpa had slit his throat when she came home, but Mark greeted her with pitchforks and knives when he called her a liar.

raining pitchforks and nigger babies 

to rain very hard with large rain drops.
"This morning it was raining pitchforks and nigger babies."

To take the torches and the pitchforks

Means to go for the ogre hunt.
Sometimes misinterpreted as courage, "to take the torches and the pitchforks" is not an act of heroism, nor bravery.
It's rather an act of desperation with the only motivation being to engage sexual activity with a very ugly individual, that would often be confused with an ogre.
Kevin: What happened to Brad at the party last night?
Martin: After 2 am he lost his standards and took the torches and the pitchforks
Kevin: damn man I would never do that (crosses his index and middle-finger behind the back)
Martin: I know! That Katia was a real Ogre!

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/to take the torches and the pitchforks

Torches are on the left, pitchforks are on the right. Come and get me! 

The one phrase which states quite clearly, the sarcastic way to finish an argument against something.
Said sarcastically or angrily, more or less, with a short burst of temper .
If someone doesn't like your opinion on anything, pretty much, this is said in huge retort to that, and pretty much defines your strong position to it.
"What? You don't like Zelda Breath of the Wild? Fine! Torches are on the left, pitchforks are on the right. Come and get me!"

Randy Pitchford 

A low-life, lying scumbag who cannot take criticism. A person who is referred to as Randy Pitchford is someone who will shift blame onto others, and never take any level of personal responsibility. Also often obsessed with magic.
I really fucking hate Jake. He’s a real Randy Pitchford