Phantom wipe

Wipe once nothing there, twice nothing. You’re starting to lose all hope in your ability to wipe yourself. Again you go in for a third wipe. And you see nothing there you begin to panic and wipe a fourth time nothing there. This is what is known as the phantom wipe. Any time you go to the bathroom and wipe yourself you check the toilet paper. If you don’t you should to make sure your getting all the … (well you know, crap). If you check and there is nothing there the first though the fourth time you just had a Phantom wipe. Or you do not know how to wipe yourself if this happens every time you go to the bathroom.

(Friend 1 has just come out of the bathroom) Friend 1: Hey dude I just had a Phantom wipe.
Friend 2: no way, those are so scary when you have the Phantom wipe.

Phantom wipe by Glockman1727AK47 January 10, 2009

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phantom wipe

When after you take a dump, you wipe your ass but see nothing on the toilet paper.

I just took a shit and did a phantom wipe.

phantom wipe by Bigg Gene March 24, 2006

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phantom wipe

(Friend 1 has just come out of the bathroom) Friend 1: Hey dude I just had a Phantom wipe.
Friend 2: no way, those are so scary when you have the Phantom wipe.

phantom wipe by Glockman1727AK47 January 6, 2009

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Phantom Wiper

A phantom wiper is an unknown person who wipes their butt on various objects.

If you see a rag, towel, rug, or a shower curtain with brown streaks you know the phantom has stricken.

"Hey did you see that towel with brown streaks on it?"

"The phantom wiper strikes again!!!"

Phantom Wiper by Nightguy06 February 3, 2026

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bang a you-ee

of Massachusetts orig. "to make a u-turn"

hey, we missed the bar, bang a you-ee

bang a you-ee by Pistolero Pierro May 4, 2008

Word of the Day on July 19, 2026

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Fleg

The word 'flag' as pronounced by people with thick Belfast accents. The term is a perfect encapsulation of the disproportionate and overblown reaction to the removal of the Union Jack (as in 'de fleg') from above City Hall in Belfast. Where previously it had flown for 365 days per year, it is now flown on 17 designated days of the year - in line with many other British cities.

The event caused a portion of the Protestant community ('fleggers') to make international pricks of themselves as they proceeded to wreck the fucking place, claiming it was another erosion of a 'British' identity they perceive to have been under attack since the horrifying spectre of equality reared its head in Northern Ireland.

The word 'fleg' - and indeed 'fleggers' - fittingly describes a section of humanity unconcerned with knowledge, reality or the vagaries of the English language. Like America's tea-baggers they are ruled by instinct, fear and paranoia with a side dish of rampant bigotry and startling ignorance of the world around them.

"Wat de fuck like! The taigs got de fleg took down! Let's wreck de fuckin place! No surrender!"

"De fleg has been took down! Before ye know it there'll be a united Ireland! Attack Short Strand! God Save The Queen!"

Fleg by OnionFleg August 9, 2013

Word of the Day on July 18, 2026

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Skeef

To take something small, that doesn't quite qualify as a theft. Probably from the Danish "skæv" or the Dutch "scheef", both of which are pronounced similarly, meaning "askew, or not quite right'. To change an item's ownership without permission, but only something small and of little worth.

"I skeefed an apple off the neighbor's tree." "I skeefed some chips outta your bag when you looked away." "Don't skeef my chair when I go to the bathroom."

Skeef by kachinaflonk July 16, 2026

Word of the Day on July 17, 2026

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