Perfect Shit 

The rare event where someone takes a shit they do it so perfectly that they do not need to use toilet paper.

Holy shit I just shit a perfect shit!

Perfect Shit by David August 8, 2006

Perfect Shit 

A bowel movement where everything goes according to plan. One continuous 'log' is dropped with no discomfort. The clincher: when you wipe, there is nothing on the TP.

This morning, Kurt took a perfect shit.

Perfect Shit by Kurt B. November 3, 2005

THE PERFECT SHIT

Every once in a while everyone experiences the perfect Brown Trout. It's rare but a real thing of beauty. You sit down expecting the worst, but what you get is a smooth sliding, fart-less masterpiece that breaks the water with the splash-less grace of an Olympic high-diving champion. You use the toilet tissue to find that it was totally unnecessary. It makes you feel that all is right in the world and that you are in perfect harmony with it.

no farts or splash back, thats the perfect shit!

THE PERFECT SHIT by BRETT THE HITMAN HOLT June 21, 2012

Perfect Double-Tapered Shit 

a.k.a. PDT
A perfect shit, tapered evenly on both ends. Especially used when unexpected after a messy meal or night out.

Got up in the morning, took the most perfect double-tapered shit I've ever had in my life. True story. Who are the pitchers in this game? -George Brett

Perfect Double-Tapered Shit by wargy2 March 26, 2019

Perfect Shitter 

An individual who eats foods he knows from experience digest easily and facilitate taking a perfect shit every day minutes after getting up in the morning.

Knowing how beneficial for her health it is to take a perfect shit each day, following her brother's advice for the first time in her life, Yvonne stopped eating bowel movement inhibiting foods—such as bread, rice, or pasta which is not whole wheat, dairy products and cow or chicken carcasses—and is becoming a perfect shitter.

Perfect Shitter by but for October 25, 2017

Phantom Shit Perfecto

A shit which leaves behind no trace. When you wipe your arse you find that it's clean, and when you look in the toilet nothing is there. You're left wondering if you actually had a shit.

- I had a shit perfecto this morning. My arse was as clean as a polished sixpence.
- That's nothing. I had a phantom shit perfecto earlier. I didn't even have to flush.

- In heaven, every shit is a shit perfecto.

Phantom Shit Perfecto by greenlectern September 1, 2010

Snake that shits perfect rats. 

1. Someone or something that participates without adding anything of substance.

Person 1: "Dude, the only thing Lenny added to the presentation was stupid transition effects."

Person 2: "I know, talk about a snake that shits perfect rats."

Snake that shits perfect rats. by Johnrad March 22, 2022