The new boyfriend. He's the one who took you away from me. He has a great jawline, nice shoulders, and muscles. He's in your bed while I'm in your Twitch chat. He's just a doormat.
by dreamnotfoundwastaken June 22, 2022
A general term used to describe someone who blatantly lies when in an argument and demands proof that they performed a specific deed.
A: No, you are incorrect, I clearly saw you throw that at me.
B: Do you have any proof? No. Thank you.
A: No jareds!
B: Do you have any proof? No. Thank you.
A: No jareds!
by Steve Plasn April 6, 2009
Jared. Well, Jared. Personally, i think he's cute. I'm sure he would make a great partner. I imagine his love to be hard, like, soft in his heart but hard in his head. His head sometimes stands in his way. Don't get me wrong, a head is very useful at times, very important. But sometimes it ruins the mood, doesnt it.
Jared needs to be affirmed that he is the one you're looking out for. Otherwise he will send a drone to your balcony checking on you. Believe me, He will! 🖤
Jared needs to be affirmed that he is the one you're looking out for. Otherwise he will send a drone to your balcony checking on you. Believe me, He will! 🖤
by Krkič June 4, 2019
A reluctant sword smith, women tend to trip over their tongues as he passes by. usually reviled by other males for having mythical penis girth. Usually compared to god like figures such as Zeus and Thor.
one of the greatest Jared's was delivered to planet earth in 1975 via non earth like space craft - is also allergic to Kryptonite.
probably the best all round rooter in the solar system, women have been known to gush uncontrollably and pass out at the mere sight of his powerful index and middle fingers - so he wears ski gloves in public - or hand prosthesis.
Once pointed at chuck Norris and Barry Dawson in a pub and told them to leave, Barry ran, Chuck fell to his knees and orgasmed uncontrollably - he wasn't wearing any gloves that day.
Everyone should nickname their penis Jared.
one of the greatest Jared's was delivered to planet earth in 1975 via non earth like space craft - is also allergic to Kryptonite.
probably the best all round rooter in the solar system, women have been known to gush uncontrollably and pass out at the mere sight of his powerful index and middle fingers - so he wears ski gloves in public - or hand prosthesis.
Once pointed at chuck Norris and Barry Dawson in a pub and told them to leave, Barry ran, Chuck fell to his knees and orgasmed uncontrollably - he wasn't wearing any gloves that day.
Everyone should nickname their penis Jared.
Fuck! I thought he was at the fortress of solitude! I better leave town, I heard he wants to fuck my wife and sister!
"Jared" I thought HE was the god of thunder, maybe he's Thor's Grandfather?
"Jared" I thought HE was the god of thunder, maybe he's Thor's Grandfather?
by Rooster 00027 May 28, 2011
A woman who is Strong Minded, Nobody's Fool, Spiritual but down to earth, Do not live in a dream world.
by Jaree December 18, 2008