Irish Story

A story, usually told by one of Irish descent, that may have a clear beginning and end but takes drastic, seemingly pointless turns throughout. The story is, in all likelihood, also completely bullshit, but not necessarily. Elements of the story may also just be exaggerated for comedic or dramatic effect, leaving the story to otherwise be truthful.

Popularized by the SleepyCabin Podcast, but likely familiar to anyone of Irish descent.

SleepyCast E9

NIALL: This is how tragic my life is: My dad used to take me out fishing, and we used to go about five times each summer for years, and we never once caught a fish between us. But, like, I was so bad at it that once, I pissed my pants, and my dad was so disappointed that we didn't catch a fish and that I pissed my pants.

ZACH: Did you piss your pants because you didn't catch a fish, or were you nervous? What'd you piss your pants for?

NIALL: I just pissed my pants.

JEFF: What is it with these stories Irishmen tell? "This one time I went to the lake and...I pissed my pants, then uh...someone threw a rock at me. The end!" I don't know what it is with these stories you guys-...you and Chris are like: "This one time I was running down the road, and there was a bug, and I stepped on it, and someone...spit in my eye. I had the worst day ever because someone spit in my eye!"

STAMPER: THAT'S SO TRUE!! THAT IS SO TRUE!!! Your stories are so all over the place!

NIALL: But...if you let me finish my story, it wouldn't be so all over the fucking place!

STAMPER: IT ALREADY IS ALL OVER THE PLACE!!

...

STAMPER: Oh, my God, dude, Niall. If you were a hitman, you would be like, "Alright, so I went up to the top of the bell tower...and I had the guy in my sight...and then I put my gun down and I ate a chocolate bar...and then I went back and..." It's like, what does the chocolate bar have to do with you killing somebody? THOSE ARE IRISH STORIES!!"' (Irish Story)

Irish Story by munchiesnOOb September 15, 2021

Irish Hat Story 

An Irish Hat Story is a story that someone tells over and over again, each time thinking that this is the first time that they have told it to the listener.

Person A: So this one time...

Person B: Oh man, not another Irish Hat Story.

Irish Hat Story by NightPhoenix March 17, 2011

Irish Storytelling 

An aimless, meandering, stream-of-consciousness narrative form rife with circumstantial details that ultimately dominate the principal plot and serve as jarring segues between thematically unrelated acts.

Person A: Hey man, whats up?
Person B: My life is so tragic. This one time I went fishing with my dad all day and we didn't catch a fish between us and then I pissed my pants. Then I saw an octopus."
A: That story was all over the place!

B: No it wasn't. I did eat a chocolate bar too.
A: Nigga, you are great at Irish Storytelling.

Irish Storytelling by Dr Auts April 10, 2015

sans sheriff 

Lawless use of fonts or typography, with no regard to aesthetics or legibility

I'm putting this CV straight in the bin. Written totally sans sheriff.

sans sheriff by Jamarley July 3, 2019

Breadhead 

Someone who is addicted to obtaining money and building wealth. A money addict and fanatic. Breadheads often work more than one full-time job, and some even participate in illicit activities to "obtain the bread".

A breadhead is like a crackhead, but for money instead of crack.

Breadhead by 🅱️ U S 3 4 8 March 30, 2022

Stink lines

As seen in illustrations or cartoons: Wavy, vertical lines rising above a person, place or thing. Denotes a foul odor.

"You didn't put enough stink lines on your picture of the teacher."

Stink lines by Athene Airheart March 14, 2004

schmegegge 

Yiddish slang word meaning bullshit, baloney, hogwash, nonsense, crock of shit or hot air.

I don't buy the schmegegge about Morty sleeping with Moira.
His version of the story was pure schmegegge.
The whole schmegegge was made up to get Liz a little bit of attention.

schmegegge by budsbabe February 1, 2008