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Holding your sausage hostage 

Masturbating
Choking the chicken
Beating the bishop
Slap boxing the one-eyed champ
Taking matters into your own hands
Squeezing the cream from the flesh twinkie
Having a date with Pam and her five friends
Having a tug-o-war with the cyclops
"the five finger knuckle shuffle on the one-eyed, blue-veined, purple-headed, custard-chucking, salty yogurt slinger."
"Jeremy, finding himself all alone, with a ready supply of porn, decided to take his sausage hostage."
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Holding your sausage hostage 

Roughing up the witness.
A date with Rosy Palm and her five sisters.
Washing the goose's neck.

Holding your sausage hostage 

roughing up the suspect.
rub one out.
Instead of holding the sausage hostage, I decided that I'd be roughing up the suspect.

abandonware 

n. software that is no longer sold or supported by the original publisher / developer, often found as free downloads on the internet because it cannot be obtained elsewhere. Not legal, but often seen as morally acceptable because the company that made it is no longer selling the title, nor releasing it as freeware, therefore abandonware is "keeping the game alive", so to speak.
Doom II is not abandonware because id still sells it, while The Incredible Machine is not sold, therefore is abandonware.
abandonware by Spoom October 24, 2003
Word of the Day on July 11, 2026

Foot prisons 

Socks. Annoying, sweat-causing, non-barefoot enducing, everyday socks.
The first thing I do when I take off my shoes, is rip off the foot prisons I had to wear inside them. That's why I prefer flip flops, even in winter!
Foot prisons by Jackalope Hunter December 13, 2022
Word of the Day on July 10, 2026

cornholio 

Ruler of Lake Titicaca. Rumored to have a bunghole that gets very angry if it does not receive toilet paper. Cornholio the Great is often seen walking around with his shirt over his head and his hands in the air, chanting songs about his power, and his bunghole.
"I am Cornholio! You do not want to face the wrath of my bunghole, for I need TP!"
Butthead: Shut up, Beavis! (uh huh huh huh)
Beavis: Um, okay. (heh heh heh heh).
cornholio by AYB July 20, 2003
Word of the Day on July 9, 2026

mickey mousing

In a movie, when the music is syncronized perfectly with the action, just like a mickey mouse cartoon.
Mickey mousing is used in the shower scene of Psycho
Word of the Day on July 8, 2026