Functionally Nude 

Functionally nude subjects are those who are wearing a decent amount of clothing, but their main sexual regions (i.e. the breasts and pussy, and occasionally ass) are left exposed.

The nudity is functional because they are only nude enough to function in during sex

Daryl: You seemed to be ploughing Jessica behind the counter at the bar last night but she was wearing clothes?
Jake: Oh, yeah, She was only Functionally Nude

Functionally Nude by Gzoom August 31, 2017

functionally-retarded

Adjective describing a person(s) who has just enough brain cells to survive; devoid of common sense and mental aptitude.

Dave is such a tool. I bet he can't even wipe his own ass. He's functionally-retarded.

People suck. Most of the general public is functionally-retarded.

functionally-retarded by Brett319 June 17, 2008

Functionally High 

When a person smokes enough marijuana to feel its effects, but not enough to alter competence at regular daily tasks or create a lasting low after the effects have worn off.

Becoming functionally high is a skill that comes naturally for some, and for others takes a long time to develop and master.

Person 1: I just got some killer bud from a friend of mine. Wanna smoke?

Person 2: Ok, but I have work in an hour. I guess I'll go in functionally high.

Functionally High by DJAlexxander September 8, 2011

Functionally Poor 

Adjective describing a person(s) who has just enough money to go out to bars, movies, etc. but never enough to go grocery shopping

Being functionally poor, Lazar never has groceries but everyone at the bars knows him!

Functionally Poor by anonymous July 23, 2015

functionally retarded 

Mental deficiency characterized by stumbling speech, disconnection with reality, and unrestrained ego, yet behavior which is accepted by at most 50% of the population.

George W. Bush is functionally retarded.

functionally retarded by John Manyjars June 20, 2008

functionally American 

A Canadian (or other non-American I suppose) who gets most of their culture from American television, music and other media.

"Do you wear that U of Michigan jersey because you went to school there or are you just functionally American?"

functionally American by Andrew July 2, 2004

Functionally Hot

Being attractive by virtue of how one uses their body, usually physically. Not to be confused with being attractive because of one's build.

Josh: To be honest, Alina Zagitova isn't really my type.
Jerry: Sure, but you should see her skate. She's functionally hot!

Functionally Hot by DMTeen November 25, 2020