finnitus

finn-i-tus, a rare virus. symptoms may show when your talking about being baked/cooked all the time (high on weed) like finn lee does. hence. now he has his own virus

(not contagious!!!) .. rather earned.

omg! he can’t stop talking about how high he is! he must have finnitus!

by finnitus patient zero November 24, 2024

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finnius

Finnius comes from the latin term for fondle or to fondle. He is hung like a jackal on heat and can drink more than a thirsty bavarian who has been stuck in a dessert for a year and a half. He looks like the cancerous scrotum of a hunched-over man on a humid afternoon. Finnius' pick-up tactics are sometimes described as Stephen Hawking talking dirty, and as such, he often is successful with high school P.E. teachers. Finnius was not born - he was cultivated from embryonic stem cells to be the perfect human. However, things went horribly wrong during the fourth month of his mother's pregnancy. She suffered a horrific upper cut, crippling her and forcing her to wait out the final trimester in a cave. Finnius spent the first two years of his life in a beaker, subsisting off the shriveled limbs of amputees.

Finnius is a simple man with few luxuries in life bar a subscription to Men's Fitness and a proclivity for whipping it out in public. His is also the proud owner of a safe deposit box stocked with flannel and wood shavings for use during lumberjack role-play. He has few friends, in part due to his tendency to leave passive aggressive post-it notes, but also due to his persistent 30 Rock references. Finnius' dreams include but are not limited to: being the on-tour tap dance choreographer for the Red Hot Chilli Peppers; growing his beard until it intertwines with his pubic hair; breaking the Guinness World Record for longest possible time to repair a moped.

"check out the flaps on that P.E. teacher, i wish finnius was here to see this"

by 8===D---finnmeup June 2, 2014

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