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Episiotomy  

A medical procedure in where a pregnant girl is cut from her poontang to her asshole to accomodate the child.
Girl- "I have news! I am preggers!"
Gay guy "Ewwww, are you are going to have your cooch streched?"
Girl- "I have a tigh poon so they are going to do a Episiotomy"
Gay guy "Whats that my dear?
Girl- "They are going to cut me from my cooch to my asshole!"
Gay guy "Dear Jesus. What happens when you shit? Do you get shit in your cooch??"
Girl- "I will have to get back to you on that"
Gay guy "Can they make my asshole bigger?"
Girl- "I will have to get back to you on that also."
------------
Girl 2 "Is this episiotomy going to help me shit better or let me accomodate donkeys?"
Doctor "I can arrange it so that you can do both at the same time. I will check to see if your insurance covers it."

Episiotomy by RobYo June 19, 2008
Urban Dictionary Merch

episiotomy 

A surgical procedue in which a slit is made connecting the rectum and the vagina so as to aid in childbirth. Results in a (hopefully temporary) cloaca-like opening.
Your head is so fat that your mom had to have an episiotomy to have you.
episiotomy by atemperman February 6, 2004

Episiotomy  

A medical procedure in where a pregnant girl is cut from her poontang to her asshole to accomodate the child.
Girl- "I have news! I am preggers!"
Gay guy "Ewwww, are you are going to have your cooch streched?"
Girl- "I have a tigh poon so they are going to do a Episiotomy"
Gay guy "Whats that my dear?
Girl- "They are going to cut me from my cooch to my asshole!"
Gay guy "Dear Jesus. What happens when you shit? Do you get shit in your cooch??"
Girl- "I will have to get back to you on that"
Gay guy "Can they make my asshole bigger?"
Girl- "I will have to get back to you on that also."
------------
Girl 2 "Is this episiotomy going to help me shit better or let me accomodate donkeys?"
Doctor "I can arrange it so that you can do both at the same time. I will check to see if your insurance covers it."
Episiotomy by RobYo April 30, 2008

penile pentrometric episiotomy 

When a big fat dick splits a pussy so bad that it rips the taint resulting in the poor bitch having to go to the emergency room for sutures.
Hello, 911, please send an ambulance immediately. I accidentally just performed a tri- input penile pentrometric episiotomy on this fucking bitch and she is bleeding like a stuck pig from the cunt and ass. She is in and out of consciousness and is going into shock. Her breath sounds are diminished and her heart rate is rapid and her pulse is weak. Her pupils are dilated and not reacting to light . She keeps screaming for more cock and an aspirin. Don't send the cops because I am doing bong hits and my medical marijuana card is expired.

Auto Episiotomy 

When you fart in such a way that your anus vibrates and is very painful that it feels like you just cut yourself a slightly bigger anus.
after burrito night I was surprised that I didn't have blood in my underwear after that auto episiotomy.
Auto Episiotomy by nemo72586 August 3, 2009

epoosiotomy

The feeling that the poo you just experienced may have resulted in a tearing of the perineum, not unlike the tearing a woman may experience during childbirth.
Person One: Why are you sitting on a pillow, today?

Person Two: Tamales with chili for dinner last night...resulted in an epoosiotomy of gigantic proportions. I'm still not sure I don't need stitches.
epoosiotomy by prussian princess December 7, 2009
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