commodem

Shit internet access

"Jonny's internet access is soooooo slow"
"What do you expect? He's only on a commodem"

by stdPikachu January 13, 2004

commodem

A wireless modem that uses your toilet for connectivity via your sewers...ya its real folks!!

See googles new idea of wireless internet connection via your toilet (New! Get FREE breakthrough broadband with Google TiSP (BETA)

Honey did you piss on the commodem again?? i cant get to my myspace page!!

by Sextant April 8, 2007

commode chode

A turd that is so large, it stuffs up a toilet's drain. Breaking it in half with a plunger, or toilet brush is sometimes needed, in the hopes it sinks like the titanic.

Bro, I ate pizza and drank coffee all day yesterday. I dropped a commode chode and flooded the dorm hallway! Don't tell anyone.

by Johnnylingus July 19, 2021

commode paralysis

A condition often associated with excessive on-toilet gaming, or other time-distracting activities, resulting in temporary loss of lower extremity use.

Damn if I didn't just fall off the shitter! Got the commode paralysis. Couldn't move my legs or feel 'em neither...BUT I KILLED ON FORTNITE, WORTH IT!!!

by YAWA January 4, 2019

commode

A politer way to say ''toilet''.

I need to make sure the cat uses the commode.

by David March 6, 2004

in commode

In a deep imperturbable sleep, as if in a coma.

“He was in commode for hours after running the marathon.”

by kulturevulture February 15, 2020

knee walking commode hugging snot slinging drunk

n.) a truly envious condition, indeed. To have consumed so much alcohol that most of one's motor skills are severely impaired. One in this condition will walk on his or her knees to decrease the distance he or she may fall in the event of a tumble, thus limiting injury, and the commode hugging comes in when the individual prays to regurgitate, thereby alleviating some of the associated nausea. The snot-slinging simply appears to be a side-effect--however when spoken to, a person in this condition will spray a combination of mucus and spit to who ever he or she is conversing with.

Alex drank way too many Tequia Fannybangers and did too many jello shots last night and wound up knee walking commode hugging snot slinging drunk before half the party guests arrived.

by Blenderhead1991 May 19, 2009