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Commonly found in a certain business park in Scranton, PA (grown locally at one Schrute Farms), the beet is considered by many to be the mother of all vegetables. Not to be eaten raw by non-beet farmers. Fact- Bears eat beets.
Andy- (bites beet, spits out) You're supposed to cook these, aren't you?

Dwight- (laughs) Cornell. (eats beet)

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Jim- Fact. Bears eat beets. Bears. Beets. Battlestar Galactica.

Dwight- What is going on? What are you doing?

Jim (aside)- Last week, I saw these glasses on sale. $4. And it only cost $7 to create the rest of the ensemble, which adds up to... (uses calculator watch) $11.

Jim- (places bobblehead on desk)

Dwight (shouting) Identity theft is not a joke, Jim! Millions of families suffer every year!

Jim- (stands up) Michael! (walks into office)

Dwight- Oh, thats funny. (stands up) Michael! (walks into office)

(theme song plays)
by <3theoffice July 26, 2010
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May 7 Word of the Day
Paper product used as a barrier against unwanted messes, such as the liner at the bottom of a bird cage.
Please put a New York Times under that before it gets all over the place.
by Phaedrus331 February 12, 2021
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2
A term Massapequa students use as a practical joke towards one another. Inducing online trauma and remorse. The shame of being "BEETS" 'd promotes social dismay and depression.
Yo man, I left my facebook up for one second and I got "BEETS" -Sir Sweeps

Well I'll be a monkey's uncle. -Bass
by Randell J August 31, 2010
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3
n1: a man's package
n2: a moron or an idiot
v1: to fuck around or slack off
n1: The boy was playing with his beet.
n2: My brother-in-law is such a beet.
v1: John spent the whole day beeting off.
by Jacobene November 25, 2003
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4
The act of questioning a friend if you would hook up with a certain girl.
Used in code in order to protect the true question. Can be said directly in front of girl.
"Beets??"
(Walking through the mall, and see a decent looking girl that you need approval of) You would say.....
'Hey bro, Beets?
by TheWhiteKnight December 14, 2007
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