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Ass filter. (anal emissions catalytic converter) 

A device for preventing the smell from some people's asses from affecting the productivity of others. Manufactured and fuelled by the Anal Emmisions Commission.

This is neccesary for those who eat a great deal of feet. In particular, Hobbit's feet.
"That stinks you shit, get a fucking ass filter!"
"You've got bowel rot! At least get an ass filter you stinky novice"

Ass-Fistey Wank 

Fairly self explainiatory, insert fist in rectum and proceed to wank ( Masterbate ) like an old maid.
''Why's the fist so smelly today Kieth?''

''I watching a bit of loose woman and, well you know the score''

''The old Ass-Fistey Wank''

''Bingo, flaccid sir''

Ass fisherman 

A master baiter skilled in the art of seducing pussycatfish
Joey was a pro ass fisherman, always reading in some pussy
Ass fisherman by D Flawless August 18, 2022

festering ass boil 

A red bulbous inflammation filled with smelly pus that usually pops when it turns green.
My doctor told me I had a festering ass boil on my left butt cheek. It must be about ready to pop I can smell the smegma from here.
festering ass boil by Taintskin September 6, 2017

faster than a cat can lick its ass 

Ever see a cat lick its ass? Then you know it's pretty damn fast.
When I heard my old man coming home right when I was in the middle of some afternoon delight with my next door neighbor, he gathered up his clothes, rock-hard dick and all, and jumped out the window faster than a cat can lick its ass.

assfisted suicide 

the act of fisting one's self to the point of expiration.
No one has committed assfisted suicide yet.