Academic Advisor 

A faculty member of your university purportedly assigned to help students plan their course schedules to fit each student's degree and career plans but who are not required to know or provide accurate information regarding available courses, pre-requisites, required courses, course alternatives, etc. and often supply advice that ends up being detrimental to the student.

Side of "academic advising" include:

Taking one or more classes that are unnecessary and ending up taking 5 years to earn a 4 year degree.

Realizing 2 weeks before graduation that you could have graduated a semester early if it weren't for that "career exploration" class you took freshman year that your advisor recommended you take to "discover your calling" or "meet people in your major."

Realizing that those transfer credits actually could have transferred and you did not need to re-take that class.

My academic advisor said I had to take a full year of underwater basket weaving courses for my degree, turns out I don't and now I won't graduate this semester.

My advisor screwed me over, I'll never the mistake of taking his advice again.

Academic Advisor by blubeblob August 13, 2012

Academic Advisor 

Someone who has made a career out of misleading students and pushing the agenda of their academic institution, even when it goes against a student's own best interests; Someone who makes money providing university students with worse advice than their peer group could offer them.

"How did you even end up in that class as a freshman anyway? Most people don't even take it until their fourth semester in college!"
"My academic advisor said I'd be able to handle it... I guess I have to take it again next spring."
"I wouldn't even bother going to them, any idiot with the internet and Microsoft Excel could probably come up with a more well-reasoned course plan."

Academic Advisor by The Real Oski August 9, 2018