Skip to main content

absenz

I have a absenz
by anonymous December 28, 2021
mugGet the absenz mug.

absent-minded

so lost in thought that one does not realize what one is doing, what is happening, etc.; preoccupied to the extent of being unaware of one's immediate surroundings.
I tried to call out to him but he didn't hear me. He wasn't paying attention. He is absent-minded
by Snowbaby January 8, 2014
mugGet the absent-minded mug.
How appropriate that an Absentee President was taken down by an overwhelming number of Absentee Votes
Hey Johnny, what's our president done lately to try and control the worldwide pandemic?

Oh, sorry "Karen", he's absent. I guess he's just an #AbsenteePresidentBeatenByAbsenteeVote
by Rosslyn Maleman November 6, 2020
mugGet the #AbsenteePresidentBeatenByAbsenteeVote mug.

Shat-in-absentia

The punitive act of 'leaving-behind' a large, commode-filling mass of fecal material that, through time, evaporation and vacancy creates an extremely unpleasant next-occupant arrival surprise; especially useful for time-share condos, infrequently accessed guest homes and seasonal-use facilities.
I'll never again be the first to enter THAT condo...the last renters shat-in-absentia. When I opened the door it was like being punched in the face by a shit-bag fist. Nas-T....
by YAWA August 21, 2016
mugGet the Shat-in-absentia mug.

Absentee Printing

The much maligned practice of printing eleventy billion pages in a busy computer lab and then leaving them unattended on a laser printer's paper tray for long periods of time. Absentee printers often confuse and annoy their fellow computer lab patrons as their excessive printing quickly buries the print jobs of other lab patrons.

This practice often forces harried college students to waste precious time sifting through dozens of pages of random senior theses, flyers, newsletters, and other miscellaneous crap in order to find their term papers, tragically thwarting last minute attempts to finish and print homework 5 minutes before class starts.

Chronic absentee printers often sit blissfully at their computers browsing Facebook for extremely long periods of time before retrieving their documents.

Absentee printing is endemic to college computer labs the world over.
Bob stormed in late to his philosopy class because his essay got caught up in the fray of absentee printing.

Jane stood hovering over the printer for five minutes as he waited for the 100 page print job of an anonymous absentee printer to hopelessly spew out of the printer.
by iNetter December 1, 2009
mugGet the Absentee Printing mug.

Strategic Absence

Noun

When you skip school on a day you have a really big assignment due, such as a project or a report. Can also apply to exams. Very common in high school and secondary school
Dude, the project's due tomorrow, are you done? No man, I'm gonna pull a strategic absence tomorrow to save my ass
by dachyr May 2, 2010
mugGet the Strategic Absence mug.

Share this definition

Sign in to vote

We'll email you a link to sign in instantly.

Or

Check your email

We sent a link to

Open your email