Skip to main content

Vlad the Impaler 

The real Dracula. Far from the cape-wearing bloodsucker, Vlad the Impaler was both a hero to the Romanians, helping to defeat the invading Turks, and at the same time a brutal monster (butchering people to prove a point, once again to the Turks). His favourite execution methods outside of impaling included getting boiled alive.
Vlad III "the Impaler" "Dracula" Tepes was a hero of the Romanian people.

Almost everyone else only knows Vlad the Impaler for the stakes.
Vlad the Impaler mug front
Get the Vlad the Impaler mug.
See more merch

Vlad The Impaler 

Vlad Tepes, Prince of Wallachia, was a figure in the Medieval era who has become connected with the Dracula legend. Forget bloodsucking, this guy was in to much more hardcore stuff. He impaled friend and foe alike. One he turned back a Turkish army when they saw thousands upon thousands of their comrades dead on wooden stakes. Once, when an envoy refused to take off his turban in his presence Vlad had it nailed to his head.
Of course, this didn't help Vlad when the Reaper came knocking for him. Eventually he was killed, by the Turks or rebellious nobles we cannot be sure. But his head was cut off, preserved in honey to keep it sweet and then stuck on a pole.
Despite his apparently hideous crimes Vlad was a good ruler. He insisted on total loyalty from his people and his ruthlessness aided him in his war against the Turkish invaders. When first ascending to power one of his first moves was to imprison the treacherous boyars who probably killed his father. And rather than heap favours upon old Lords he apparently prefered to knight members of the peasantry.
Although, as we've seen, it wasn't enough to save him.
Vlad The Impaler was a horribly cruel man but an effective warlord and disciplinarian.
Vlad The Impaler by Tyburn January 2, 2008

Vlad the Impaler 

The male sex organ used to eject semen and urine out.

More commonly know as a "penis".
Vlad the Impaler invaded the Ottoman Empire.

Vlad the Impaler 

The nickname of Big Al, receiving this name from the extremely large penis he has. So gargantuan that in the process of sexual intercourse Al has impaled many of his ladies/victims going from the vagina straight through the brain.
It is also believed that this anomaly, I mean the pure massiveness of his penis, is the result of Big Al being the child of Chuck Norris.
Shit! Vlad the Impaler has struck again! Well boys I don’t think this bitch will be walking for a while.
Vlad the Impaler by Lead_Ballz July 21, 2008

Vlad the Impaler 

This is where an individual has to take a shit in the wee hours of the morning and sleepily stumbles into the bathroom without turning on the lights. Being half asleep and disoriented in the dark,the individual squats,but is off a few inches,and sits on the handle to the toilet brush or commode plunger located next to the toilet,thusly impaling themselves.
After my terrifying Vlad the Impaler experience,I now religiously turn on the bathroom lights.
Vlad the Impaler by wolfbait51 December 11, 2011
It is said of the situation where a person has the bad luck to make contact with his testicles against an undefined surface or object, intentioned or not.
Given the nature of the word, it is more appropriate to design cases where the interaction is made with a moving object, for example, a ball.
Although it is extremely painful for the victim, it tends to be considerably funny to people who witness it.
Today in the baseball game the pitcher took a nutshot; the baseball hit him in the nuts.

Man, I just watched the funniest nutshot video ever.
Nutshot by Uberflaven March 1, 2009
Word of the Day on June 26, 2026

Nerd neck 

A "human" that spends so much time playing video games that their posture is level nerd neck. Everytime anyone goes tryhard they hunch down and their neck gets longer there fore a nerd neck is always hunched down cause they're always going try hard. In other words a nerd neck is a try hard, since their neck is 100% longer than the average human being due to playing too many video games and taking them serious, nerd necks are not even considered human anymore but something more sad. Nerd necks are often found on fortnite, their natural habitat usually being tilted towers.
What a fucking nerd neck!

He is building so fast, nerd neck!

Looser more like a nerd neck ha!
Nerd neck by D Sandwich Maker February 5, 2019
Word of the Day on June 25, 2026