Umbertide
A large aquatic animal known for its enormous size and gentle, slow movements
Its rare sightings are followed by gatherings of huge hopeful crowds who sometimes set up camp for days striving to catch a glimpse of the beast
Reports have placed the Umbertide in the eastern Italian coast, the northern French coast and occasionally Dover, England
Biologists confirm characteristic traits include a disproportionate stomach and a digestive process that results in potent, prolonged and ear shattering farts
Its rare sightings are followed by gatherings of huge hopeful crowds who sometimes set up camp for days striving to catch a glimpse of the beast
Reports have placed the Umbertide in the eastern Italian coast, the northern French coast and occasionally Dover, England
Biologists confirm characteristic traits include a disproportionate stomach and a digestive process that results in potent, prolonged and ear shattering farts
"Hey man, wanna go see if we catch a glimpse of the Umbertide?"
"Sweet! Let's go!"
"Hey - did you take your ear plugs with you?"
"Why?"
"Why? Don't you know that if it farts near you and you aren't using protection your eardrums shatter?"
"Sweet! Let's go!"
"Hey - did you take your ear plugs with you?"
"Why?"
"Why? Don't you know that if it farts near you and you aren't using protection your eardrums shatter?"
Umbertide by Eddie Freemantle September 28, 2020
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