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The Tampon

A mediocre personality, sets a poor example as a friend, widely regarded as a horrible person, an inadequate lover and definitely on the outer as a loved family member.

Rarely will you find someone who likes the cut of this mans jib.

Last seen taking stock of himself.

Prior to that, last seen taking a good hard look at himself. It's likely that he was the person who last saw himself, whilst taking a look at himself. Because that makes sense.

NB: Occasionally a good bloke but barely deserves a mention. In the interest of being balanced, he has excellent taste in choosing groomsmen for his wedding.
"Gee, I hope The Tampon comes out of retirement next season"

"Ha! Did you hear The Tampon injured himself again?"

"The tampon is not a good friend but I now feel obligated to keep him around"
by Betterthanyou2012 December 12, 2012
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the tampon channel

Any channel like Bravo or Oxygen which has programs aimed towards more feminine audiences. Known for abundance of tampon commercials.
Me and my girlfriend were watching TV together, but since nothing that she wanted to watch was on, I got stuck watching the tampon channel.
by I am a Piranha August 29, 2007
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unplug the tampon

A phrase used to describe a situation where people become extremely emotional, expressing traits similar the female period.
Damn bro not tryna unplug the tampon. chill.
by Theonetruebobo July 17, 2018
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Take The Tampon Out

Colin: "Dude I Dont Want To Hit Him With The Paper Ball"

Nick: "Dude take the tampon out and do it!!!!"
by Nick Schauble May 3, 2008
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Muffy the tampon slayer

A girl with a heavy flow on.
What's up with all the bathroom breaks?

I've got a crimson tidal wave, girl, I'm Muffy the tampon slayer!
by Shuaman June 9, 2021
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The Drunken Tampon

Apparently the foolish kids in my generation thought getting drunk the regular way wasn't working too good so they created "the drunken tampon." It involves soaking a tampon in vodka then inserting it into your vagina, or if you're a boy your anus. I don't know if this results in actual intoxication but why don't you try it and let me know! haha
We totally convinced Sue to do the drunken tampon last nite!
by cArMaSaBiTcH August 12, 2009
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The French Tampon

When you soak your tampons in only the finest French champagnes. Such as a Salon Blanc de Blancs Le Mesnil-sur-Oger 2002. or a Pol Roger Sir Winston Churchill. Chilled is best, the champagne and the tampon.
"J'ai trempé mon tampon uniquement dans le meilleur champagne français" - How you tell people you are doing the French Tampon.
by Le Chatouilleur Français March 7, 2023
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