Quite possibly THE dumbest fucking show on the face of the Earth. I would rather guzzle cat piss while getting raped up the ass by Wesley Snipes while having bamboo splintered under my fingernails while having my balls chewed on by Jaws (the villain from James Bond) while getting a blowjob from Jaws (the shark from the movie) while watching the episode of Dragon Ball Z where you THINK Vacheta is going to fight Goku but they say it'll be in the next episode while listening to a 7 year old on Counterstrike: Source brag about how he's "teh leet balls" than watch The Hills.
by saucyn00b March 9, 2009
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1: a very, very shitty TV show on MTV that depicts the struggles of College-aged white women who move to Beverly Hills in search of a better life by making a perfect life look overly-difficult and dramatic

2: a raised area of ground
Chick 1: I'm Blond and I can't even figure out how to get a toaster to work! Wanna go watch The Hills?!
Chick 2: *screaming* AAAAHHHH!!! YES!!! I LOVE THAT SHOW!!
Chick 1: *also screaming* I KNOW RIGHT?!? Hey Bobby, come watch the Hills with us!!
Bobby: I will watch that fucking horrible excuse for a television program as soon as you and your friend lick each other's cunts.
Chick 1: Y'okay.
Bobby: Wha-?

Hey, this raised area of ground looks like a hill, not to be confused with that tv show characterized by a clusterfuck of bulimic whores whining about their perfect lives not being easy, The Hills.
by Slagathor The Weegee Slayer March 14, 2010
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The most boring show in the universe. It consist of a bunch of rich assholes who do not have jobs but spend glorious amounts of money on starbucks, martinis, and abortions. Conversations consist of talking about whos hooking up or what club they plan on hitting up that night. The cycle repeats until the season ends. You will learn more from watching a snail cross a highway than watching this show. If you see an average looking person on the show than you probably accidently saw a commercial.
Blond girl: What happened last night?
Other blonde girl: Spencer was totally hitting on Stacy.
Blonde girl: I don't know what to do. How can I trust him?
Other blonde girl: I think hes going to McFags tonight.
Blonde girl: We should totally go and make him jealous.
Other blonde girl: Totally.
etc etc etc

Viewer: Holy fuck the Hills is the lamest show ever.
by MTV Shows Suck July 14, 2009
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'The Hills' sadly is what's rotting the brains of the MTV generation. It's supposed to be the real-life version of 'The O.C.', but from what I've seen of it it's even less believable. What's worse is that the cast are actually celebrities. But they're everyting you don't want in a celebrity - they're dumb, phony attention-seekers!
The HillsMTVHeidiLaurenAudrinaWhitneyKristinHeidi MontagLauren ConradAudrina PartridgeWhitney PortKristen Kavallari
by ShudaGone2Specsavers May 21, 2009
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A horrible reality show about a bunch of skinny rich white college kids dealing with their picture perfect life. They've got everything going for them but still find time to whine. abercrombie-kid,laguna beach,she-twig
Platinum Blonde: man im so pissed how perfect my life is so i think im gonna make up some lame drama.

Dirty Blonde: Yeah me too. gosh life in the hills sucks
by The Bad Q August 9, 2006
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Wealthy, upperclass, suburban area marked by large properties, larger houses, and sometimes even larger populations of jews. The local police force will usually have nothing better to do than break up high school parties, and the local high schoolers will usually have nothing better to do than spend their parents' money on copius amounts of marijuana and smirinof twist. Keep your eyes open for a high ratio of Starbucks to 7-11s, and an almost unsettling shortage of blacks. Mexicans are right out.
"There were a lot of parties in the hills that night, so I grabbed my pink northface and my prada purse and waited in my foyer for Rebecca to pick my up in her Land Rover."
by Beaver Posse March 28, 2006
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A television show that is at the forefront of the downfall of American society. Recent studies have shown that The Hills has aided in the existence of 100 million pointless arguments per day, most often occurring between teen to early twenty year old females who relate to the devastating issues a filthy rich, uneducated, ignorant person from "the hills" of California experiences. Anthropologists agree that this detriment to society could have been avoided through the use of logic and reasoning in communication, something the producers and actors of The Hills take pride in lacking. The study released the following warning signs for parents and friends who have not yet been stricken with the mental retardation that occurs after viewing only one episode:

1. After using words like integral, ionic, colloquial, the female has glossy eyes followed by an abysmal stare and possible fainting.

2. The female has moved to heavier programs (known as reality mainlining) such as The Jersey Shore or Rock of Love.

3. During programs like Family Guy or Breaking Bad the female avoids the television and logs on to facebook.

If you know of someone with these symptoms you should consult your local library using similar tactics Reggie from The Basketball Diaries used to help Leonardo DiCaprio kick heroin.
Man my girlfriend is being a real bitch today. I mean more than usual. She must have just watched The Hills.
by Diffiv May 4, 2010
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