Skip to main content

Sporting Woods 

The erections that Jim Nance and Johnny Miller produce whenever they are able to work Tiger Woods name into a golf tournament broadcast. Which is, of course, whenever possible.
Jim Nance: Tom Watson hurt his elbow on the 6th Hole.
Johnny Miller: Tiger Woods has elbows.
Jim Nance: The elbows of a champion as a matter of fact.
(off camera)
Johnny Miller: Are you pants getting tighter?
Jim Nance: Oh Yeah, we're sporting woods!
Sporting Woods by Fist of Fury April 12, 2008
Sporting Woods mug front
Get the Sporting Woods mug.
See more merch

sporting wood 

Having an erection in a public place such as the office, or a club.
I had lunch with the new secretary, and was suddenly sporting wood on the drive back to the office.

Dick's Sporting Wood 

Giant retailer of condoms and other sexual enhancement products.
Joff: My girlfriend is coming into town this weekend. I can't wait to give her the balogna pony. I need to pick up a 12 pack of condoms.

LL: I heard Dick's Sporting Wood is having a blow-out sale on condoms and viagra this weekend.

Joff: Awesome! Do you need me to pick you up anything while I'm there?

LL: Yes, can you get me some of that Black Magic? I plan on getting some poontang of my own!
Dick's Sporting Wood by joff leff December 28, 2011

SPORTING MORE WOOD THAN A LUMBERYARD 

to be in possession of a diamond cutter, or "rager."
After winning the lottery, I was sporting more wood than a lumberyard.