Simon Pitman

A big guy with a small doink. He thinks he is so cool and he tries roasting people but they all suck. He tends to date girls that are at least 5+ years older than him and they all live across the country. He is incapable of dating people in his own state. Every time he gets a paper cut or stubs his toe he gets a cast

you see that guy always faking injuries and dating girls older than him, yeah that's Simon Pitman