ShitBit
The ShitBit has a slightly uncomfortable intra-anal sensor implanted but after awhile, it’s virtually imperceptible!
ShitBit by Dr Bunnygirl December 6, 2019
Get the ShitBit mug.
Shitbit
Similar to a Fitbit around your wrist, this device goes around your waist. Every time you defecate, it will sense that you are about to excrete fecal matter and will start going to work. With its advanced detection system, this device will calculate the amount of snickers dropped in the punch bowl, total squeezes of the sphincter, and will even detect the development of hemorrhoids during the painful process of squeezing out your piping hot logs. At the end of the week, the device will send you a report of how many dumps you have taken each day. It will also recommend lifestyle changes if you are dropping the kids off at the pool too frequently throughout the week. This device is available for a price of $69.99.
Tyrant: Yo dude, my shits have been crazy lately. The tater tots I ate yesterday legit blew through me like a laxative. I bought a Shitbit to help me track how many times I shit per day and the number is astounding. On average, i shit about 4 to 5 times a day.
Big Easy: Bro you might want to see a doctor about that. It seems kinda unhealthy.
Tyrant: Nah dude, doctors are overrated. That’s why I bought a Shitbit. It recommends specific lifestyle changes and even gives you words of encouragement like Siri does sometimes.
Big Easy: Siri and I had sex once.
Big Easy: Bro you might want to see a doctor about that. It seems kinda unhealthy.
Tyrant: Nah dude, doctors are overrated. That’s why I bought a Shitbit. It recommends specific lifestyle changes and even gives you words of encouragement like Siri does sometimes.
Big Easy: Siri and I had sex once.
Related Words
Shitbit
A fictional - but not unrealistic bathroom aid. When passing an abnormally large shit there should be a gum shield type device on a wall bracket or rope next to you - bite down when that mud child is making life unbearable. Can also be useful day after Halloween when half chewed nuts come out pointy like fucking glass shards.
“Man I dropped a Shamu deuce last night that would have wet the first 6 rows at seaworld. Had to bear down hard on my shitbit”
Shitbit by Quagmire Ton bastardo November 14, 2019
ShitRite
A colloquial and derogatory alternative name for the ShopRite chain of supermarkets located in the U.S. North East. Usually used by someone who hates shopping at the store or hates working there.
You don't want to work at ShitRite, you should be a peepshow janitor instead. At least you'll get more respect doing that.
Yukkuri shiteitte ne
A meme involving giant, disfigured heads resembling those of Touhou characters. It originated on 2ch in early 2008 when an Anon tried to make a Shift_JIS portrait of Reimu and Marisa and failed horribly. Another Anon thought the failed attempt was humorous and drew the infamous original picture (shown below right). Ever since that fateful day, yukkuri heads have dominated parts of NicoNico and made cameos in numerous other pieces of Touhou fanart. Their catchphrase "Yukkuri shiteitte ne!" literally means "Do it slowly!", but has been more loosely translated as "Take it easy!" by the English-speaking Touhou community. This remains the basis for many of the jokes centered on yukkuris.
Yukkuri shiteitte ne by That one guy over there in the August 17, 2009