Seven-Layer Loser 

An individual who has sustained a life of failure in no fewer than seven areas unique to human existence. These areas include, but are not limited to, spirituality, intellectualism, fitness, optimism, family relationships, romantic relationships, philosophy, finance, career, philanthropy, academics. A true "Seven-Layer Loser" is incapable of even portraying themselves in any way as complete, accomplished or appreciated.

Kim Kardashian is the Michael Jordan of seven-layer losers.

Seven-Layer Loser by LeighRay November 6, 2017

Semen Laser 

When you have so much control over your ejaculate that you can pretty much spatter your DNA on, over or into pretty much anything you want, with deadly accuracy.

Did you see that shot, damn honey, I just shot you right and tight with my Semen Laser.

Semen Laser by storm1979 July 26, 2011