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A person who is paid to professionally scream at a computer.
Programmer: "AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH-oh, it works."
by MidnightWasTwoHoursAgo June 18, 2018
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Aug 11 Word of the Day
You can tell by the way she walks, she got that WAP.

You can look at her face and tell she ain't got that WAP.
by Black Don August 06, 2020
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2
proΒ·gramΒ·mer (n) An organism capable of converting caffeine into code.
Programmer A "You started on that program yet? When's it due anyway?"

Programmer B "Nah, not yet, and its due tomorrow morning at eight!"

Programmer A "Damn, you gonna get it done in time?"

Programmer B "Yeah, I've got a bottle of Stacker II's and a pot of coffee, I should be fine."
by its_allgood December 08, 2005
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4
A programmer is a human, rock, or any other object capable of turning pizza and caffeine into code. Programmers minds are very complex - they like to explain things in ways that a normal human would not understand, and makes jokes that only programmers would laugh at.
Programmer 1: You create a gun module, a gun class, a foot module and a foot class. After realising you can't point the gun at the foot, you pass a reference to the gun to a foot object. After the foot is blown up, the gun object remains alive for eternity, ready to shoot all future feet that may happen to appear.

Programmer 2: BWAHAHAHAHAAHHA

Programmer 1: I even have one about Java!
You find that Microsoft and Sun have released imcompatible class libraries both implementing Gun objects. You then find that although there are plenty of feet objects implemented in the past in many other languages, you cannot get access to one. But seeing as Java is so cool, you dont care and go around shooting anything else you can find.
by Quojil February 18, 2014
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Semi-sentient being who inexplicably survives an extremely unhealthy lifestyle. Usually found in confined spaces with low lighting, at a computer terminal.
by Anza Sumeragi January 22, 2006
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6
A programmer is a person who passes as an exacting expert on the basis of being able to turn out, after innumerable punching, an infinite series of incomprehensive answers calculated with micrometric precisions from vague assumptions based on debatable figures taken from inconclusive documents and carried out on instruments of problematical accuracy by persons of dubious reliability and questionable mentality for the avowed purpose of annoying and confounding a hopelessly defenseless department that was unfortunate enough to ask for the information in the first place.
Finance Director: "Hey programmer guy. When is the stock predicted to change?"

Programmer: "01001001 00100000 01100100 01101111 01101110 00100111 01110100 00100000 01101011 01101110 01101111 01110111"
by Gromitted August 11, 2011
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