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You're pissing on me!

alternative for the saying "You have got to be kidding me"

used to show disbelief or dismay.
girl 1: "She likes him again!"
girl 2: "You're pissing on me!"

Fat bitches be pissing on me

When things aren't going your way, times are tough, and there is nothing you can do about it but you have to deal with it anyway.
1) My girl mad at me. My car won't start and now I'm late to work again. Man...Fat bitches be pissing on me!

2) My coach keep screaming at me to "get the bar off my chest" but I'm smoked. Fat bitches be pissing on me!