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PIP pimp

Someone who doesn’t work, doesn’t struggle, but somehow drives a brand new car and watches every im a celebrity get me out of here episodes on T.V.

Treats sitting down as an endurance sport and socialising as their main daily achievement.

Often spotted perfecting the art of doing absolutely nothing while claiming chronic exhaustion from a day consisting of naps, scrolling tik tok videos, and a heroic trip to Tesco for some ciders and pizza in theyre brand new disability car.

Main social activity is visiting other PIP pimps to compare sofas, meds, and excuses.

Talks about “how they miss working" all while smoking a big fat reefer and siping on a can of super tennants!

Doesnt know what an alarm clock is anymore?

The last time they worked was when they had to fill out a PIP form!

Qualifying for stupid syndrome illnesses like (CSFS)
Chronic Sofa Fatigue Syndrome and

GED generalised effort disorder

Has more medical acronyms than qualifications

Knows benefit rules better than the governments (DWP) department of working pensions
“Dave says he’s shattered today — he drove to three other PIP pimps, sat down six times, and survived a Costa Coffee all while eating luxury "jew shelf" foods. Absolute warrior.”
by Wildlife Brambler December 14, 2025
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