A polite way of saying "motherfucking asshole," as Oedipal refers to the "Oedipal Complex," in which a boy/man has feeling of romantic and/or sexual love for his mother. Oedipal, in turn, comes from "Oedipus," the character in the play by Sophocles, who grows up away from his mother and later marries her without knowing who she is and his relation to her.
Anus, of course, is that posterior anatomical orifice also known as the "asshole."
While our lifespan is the number of years we will live, our healthspan is the number of healthy years we will have and our sexspan is is the number of years we will continue to be healthy enough to continue having an active sex life.
A lighthearted reaction upon receiving disappointing news of some sort. Usually something that isn't a particularly a big deal, esp. when it primarily affects someone else - sort of a mild schadenfreude. Sometimes doubled or tripled, and possibly said in a sing-songy voice for added comedic effect to imitate a muted trumpet, which is how the meme originated.