a) "To Melch"- verb
A treat of a sexual practice amongst necrophiliacs the
world over. A male and an accomplice must find a girl of childbearing
age who has been dead for ideally five to seven days and has not been stored in refrigeration.
Male "A" presses his open mouth up against the vagina of the dead lady, whilst male "B" jumps onto her stomach, slamming his
feet down. This will displace the decomposing contents of her uterus, sending it rocketing forth, down the vaginal canal and into the mouth of male A, whose objective is to catch and swallow as much as possible.
b)"Melch", noun.
The week old, rotting lining of a woman'
s uterus following death. A
sloppy substance, reddish brown in
colour, with plenty of chewable lumps.
The verb form- "Rob and I were feeling slightly
hungry, so Rob retrieved the carcass he'd been safely storing under his
bed, and we melched her dry."
The noun form- "I was feeling a little peckish after my Dungeons and Dragons
marathon, so I fetched a luncbox full of melch that I'd been saving by the radiator, and tucked in."