Klaenex 

Easily confused with the tissue brand. But do not let them fool you. They are actually a sentient tissue box. A sentient tissue box that controls the government. A tissue box that controls the government and is an alien. From space. A sentient tissue box that controls the government that is also an alien, from space.

“Have you been in contact with a Klaenex? If so, please go home and quarantine yourself for over six days.”

Klaenex by Tallico April 6, 2023

kleenex friendship 

Litterally means:
A friend that calls you and chase you until he gets whatever he needs, and then BYE!

One of those friend of you that is an incredible dude, cheerful and happy, great company, maybe even successful. Only real problem with him is that you feel used after having seen him and stayed with him because you realise he only used that valuable time spent together.

A:I feel terribly bad I didn't call you on the last week mate!
B: no worries dude, I know this is a kleenex friendship.

kleenex friendship by LOL.renzo April 29, 2015

The Great Moroccan Kleenex Shortage of 08-09 

In March of 2008 the demand for Kleenex's in Morocco increased at an unbelievable rate. The Moroccan King asked for everyone to stay calm. He attributed the increase in demand for Kleenex to Peace Corps volunteers spending too much time in their masterbatorium, spanktuary, spank schack, whack shack, jack shack, flip n jack, finger hut, spank cave, spank wagon, cumgeon, cum station, lunch punch, stroke boat, spank bank, corner of crank, jerk hut, masturbation station, spankmobile, homostead, spank shed, and master barriums. In particular, undercover sources attibute the increase to one "King of Crank" J-Lub (known for exceptional stroking form.) When asked for comment, J-Lub simply said "whatever dude, I'm gonna go listen to some music." The King has told people to hold strong. The King also claimed that supplies are expected to return to normal around the time of Tallstacks 2010.

Oh man, I shouldn't have ate all that spicy couscous. Now I can't blow my nose due to The Great Moroccan Kleenex Shortage of 08-09

The Great Moroccan Kleenex Shortage of 08-09 by Pedro2010 December 29, 2009

kleenex guy

A guy you use once and throw away - the perfect rebound

A hot lifegueard is the perfect rebound, use him once and throw him away- he's a Kleenex Guy

kleenex guy by NotAllHeroesWearCapes May 2, 2015

Kleenex fuck 

You blow in it and throw it away.

I wouldn't fold her up and put her back in my pocket - she's just a Kleenex fuck.

Kleenex fuck by dabadone January 14, 2010

Country Kleenex 

To gracefully hold one nostril closed with your index finger, while blowing snot out of the other; generally on the ground. Can be used when tissues are or are not available.

Uncle Jesse never uses a tissue when he's oustide in Southern Missouri, he just uses the Country Kleenex.

Country Kleenex by Fancy of Chicago and Savannah December 9, 2008

Ghetto Kleenex 

n. a roll of toilet paper.

"Give me some of your ghetto kleenex!" Jovan said.

Ghetto Kleenex by Bruce Citron October 1, 2009