Kato, the Purest Victim 

The man who woke up in mustard circa 2012, done by his friend and a screaming child.

Kato was peacefully dreaming in his pink lipstick blanket on a pull out couch, defenseless, pure, peaceful. Two terrorists walked into the room, one wielding a bottle of mustard (the weapon in this situation) and proceeds, aside a young child, to drench Kato in the substance, causing immense confusion followed by an approximately 1 minute state of hysteria. Kato is noticeably upset by the attack, shouting at the terrorists whilst also being a yellow mess. A child is heard painfully screaming aside the hysterics caused by Kato and the mustard menace. Kato, who is currently unable to breathe, lunges at the young child and slightly elder one, killing them before the tape cuts.

The tape is currently being held by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation and was shown during the court case and on a YouTube video, titled "Kato caught slippin str8 mustard face"

Me: Have you heard the story of Kato, The Purest Victim?
Friend: What a tragedy, it was.

Kato, the Purest Victim by alecwind July 18, 2021