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Granola Joe 

GRANOLA JOE IS YOUR DOOM. GRANOLA JOE IS THE VANISHING POINT OF ALL DESTINY, THE EVENT HORIZON BEYOND WHICH ALL IS DARKNESS AND VOID. GRANOLA JOE WILL COME BEARING GIFTS. GRANOLA JOE WILL TELL YOU THAT YOU LOOK REALLY COOL IN THAT SHIRT. GRANOLA JOE WILL OFFER TO HELP YOU PUT TOGETHER YOUR IKEA FURNITURE AND THEN ACTUALLY FOLLOW THROUGH. GRANOLA JOE WILL MAKE YOU FEEL LOVED AND VALUED. GRANOLA JOE WILL INCREASE THE STANDARD OF LIVING OF ALL HUMAN BEINGS THAT ARE TOUCHED BY ITS SEETHING, HUNGRY SHADOW. GRANOLA JOE WILL DECEIVE YOU. GRANOLA JOE WILL TELL YOU WHAT YOU WANT TO HEAR. GRANOLA JOE WILL DEMAND THINGS YOU DO NOT UNDERSTAND. GRANOLA JOE WILL SHOW YOU THE MEANING OF POWER. GRANOLA JOE WILL SUBSUME YOU. GRANOLA JOE WILL LOVE YOU IN A WAY YOU WILL NEVER BE ABLE TO COMPREHEND. GRANOLA JOE, UNCONQUERED, UNYIELDING, GRANOLA JOE, UNCEASING, DEVOURING, GRANOLA JOE, ASCENDANT, ALL-DESIRING, GRANOLA JOE. GRANOLA JOE. GRANOLA JOE. GRANOLA JOE.
IN THE FETID, ECONOMICALLY APPOINTED INTERIOR OF THE WINNEBAGO, GRANOLA JOE LIES IN SPLENDID REPOSE, SHROUDED IN GREASY HAWAIIAN SHIRTS AND DECAYING PLASTIC LEIS.
Granola Joe by GRANOLA JOE September 12, 2019
Words you can keep
More from Urban Dictionary
A slang term used to describe a bald person, typically someone who is completely bald or has a closely shaved head. The term is derived from the infamous, hairless kids’ cartoon character of the same name.
Example 1:
“Did you see that caillou over there? His head is reflecting the sun like a disco ball.”
Example 2:
“I think Dave is finally accepting his hair loss. He just went full caillou and shaved the whole thing off.”
caillou by WMH01 September 12, 2026
Word of the Day on September 13, 2026

Brought-upsy 

scruples; to have manners;

May also be spelt Brought-upsie

WestIndian/Caribbean in orient - Barbados, WHUT.
Example 1: Child, you ain't got no brought-upsy?

Translation: My Child, have you not any manners?



Example 2: What, you ain't got no brought-upsy?

Translation: I can't believe you're doing that. Were you not taught any manners as a child?
Brought-upsy by B-Town Gilly April 20, 2005
Word of the Day on September 12, 2026
The practice of modifying a model (not limited to toy action figures) to achieve some result other than that intended by the manufacturer. ...
I had to kitbash my Luke Skywalker figure with my Darth Vader figure because Luke was missing a hand.
kitbash by geru January 15, 2006
Word of the Day on September 11, 2026

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There are no hot girls in the area, theres only satellite baddies.
Satellite baddies by Banksy123 September 5, 2026
Word of the Day on September 10, 2026
Omg, the ramifications!”
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Rammys by Brandonmical August 4, 2023
Word of the Day on September 9, 2026

Failure Shower 

When you fail at something in life (eg. failing an exam or not getting a job), go home and spend an hour just standing in the shower, propping yourself up against the wall with your eyes on your feet.
Caleb knew the only thing to do after he didnt get prefect was take a failure shower.
Failure Shower by Vikingnz October 27, 2009
Word of the Day on September 8, 2026
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