Genius Bar

Apple's tech support station located in every Apple Store. Their specialties include:
- Run by minimum wage earning 18 year olds.
- Knows how to open Apple products and check the water damage indicators.

- If water damage indicators turn pink they charge you $1200 for a new motherboard and display. If not, they cannot fix the problem and they recommend you buy a new $2000 Macbook.

Customer: My Iphone X’s back glass is broken can you fix it?
Genius: Sure! I’ll be right back.
Genius: Unfortunately, we have to replace the entire motherboard, charging port, and camera because we fused the back glass to it.

Customer: Huh? Why did you guys design your phones in such a stupid way?
Genius: Because fuck you that’s why. Oh, and the repair will be $500 + Tax.

Customer: Well, I can’t be seen holding a cracked Iphone in front of my 3 friends so I must have the repair.

- Genius Bar staff

Genius Bar by Squag tentacles November 25, 2018

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barroom genius

Someone who has the gift of bull****. Usually is the one at the bar that pretends to be an expert on a subject after reading one newspaper article on it. Usually is thought of as a "genius" by the surrounding drunks, who don't know any better.

John: Hey, did you hear what Sam had to say on that subject last night at the bar??

Mike: Are you kidding? That idiot is a barroom genius. The only people dazzled by him are the drunk fools that don't know any better.

barroom genius by GiGi9339 April 26, 2010

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Hate Sink

A person you hate intensely not because they deserve such hatred but because they serve as a focus for your general hatred. A healthy way to dispense with excess animosity.

Jake's not really that big an asshole. He just serves as my hate sink.

Hate Sink by The great prophet Zarquon August 7, 2016

Word of the Day on July 26, 2026

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funiosity

The art of being peculiar, but in an amusing fashion.

"Wow, look at that dog running on three legs"
- "Yeah, that sure is a funiosity"

funiosity by Supersonic Stevie November 23, 2007

Word of the Day on July 25, 2026

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Toe Rag

A toe rag was originally a foot wrapping used, since mediaeval times up until the mid-nineteenth century, to protect the foot from chafing by boots or shoes. As these were, quite literally, rags they weren’t usually washed, and so with use they became very smelly until they were thrown away. Because of the similarity in smell, toe rag also became the name applied to dried, salted cod or other things with a strong, unpleasant, fishy smell. It didn’t take that long before the name was applied to someone who was an obnoxious, unpleasant OIC.

1 “Socks! Those aren’t socks you smelly git, they’re toe rags!”
2 “What have you been cooking? Smells like toe rag!”
3 “I can smell ‘er fanny from ‘ere, proper toe rag.”
4 That Heale Malcolm is a right toe rag.

Toe Rag by AKACroatalin November 29, 2016

Word of the Day on July 24, 2026

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Eternity leave

When some resigns or retires from a job, they are on "eternity leave". This can also refer to someone who has passed away, especially someone who worked somewhere for a long time, retired/resigned, then passed away later.

Oh I'm sorry, you didn't know that Kelly is on eternity leave? She resigned and moved to Hawaii!

With regrets I would like to inform you that my boss is officially on eternity leave. I will never see or hear them again. Ever.

Eternity leave by LingDanc803 February 7, 2023

Word of the Day on July 23, 2026

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jody

The hypothetical man (often a sinister character who decided not to go to boot camp) that is doing your girlfriend/wife while you are on deployment overseas.

Ain't no use in goin home,
Jody's got your girl and gone.
Ain't no use in goin back,
Jody's got your Cadillac,
Ain't no use in feeling blue,
Jody's took your checkbook too.

jody by Sgt Apan March 31, 2006

Word of the Day on July 22, 2026

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