Flotched

adj: Having an alcohol to blood ratio so monumentally fucked that one vomits up everything but their stomach lining, intermittent w/ apologies and various exclamations of 'I'm going to die'. One may be deemed 'flotched' if symptoms include insisting to the night manager that they be put on community service, being vulnerable to A+ Facebook hacks, or begging to have one's stomach pumped.

'Fuck I was flotched last night...'

'I know dude, I saw the pictures on Facebook'.

by qwertyuiop;lkjhgfdszxcvb456 May 11, 2014

Flotched

Drunk, incoherent, Intoxicated

Last night we got flotched.

by BayouSailor July 15, 2006

flotch

When a woman passes gas out of her anus and the air bubble goes up her vagina.

I thought I had to fart but it ended up as a flotch.

I will never wear those jeans again. I was flotching all night long.

by Elleicia March 19, 2008

to flotch

to aimlessly switch channels on TV, usually late at night, when you have nothing better to do but don't feel like going to bed yet.

Wife comes homes, husband is sitting in front of the TV. She asks: "Hey honey, what are you watching?"
Husband answers: "Nothing, I'm just flotching."

When ads interrupt my show I can't help but to start flotching.

I don't really watch TV, but I like to flotch.

by Fat Dobby July 26, 2015

flotch

to gamble and lose. a fart that's much too wet. similar to a shart, but much, much worse.

oh lord, i just flotched!

by stueyscott June 23, 2005

flotch

Fat crotch. The area of a male or female's flabby torso that connects to the crotch area to form a basketball-like appendage.

Mr. Joe's flotch hit me in face as he turned to hand me my graded paper.

by ellimist February 05, 2008

flotch

See felch

I flotched your Mom last night.
9 out of 10 dentists recommend you flotch every day.

by Josh February 11, 2003