feldman
(n.) A messy accident on a floor or other surface consisting of bodily fluids as a result of pornography shoots or other socially unacceptable behavior.
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Feldman
1. A man or a woman who shows a complete and utter disregard for the financial, physical, or emotional well-being of another fellow man.
2. A man or woman who shows an astounding lack of work and personal ethic.
3. A man or woman who shows an irrational fear of participating in any event pertaining to the advancement of the human race. (i.e. Incredibly Lazy)
4. A man or woman who is considered to be an extreme coward.
5. A man or woman who shows a severe allergy towards to truth in any fashion.
6. A man or woman who is well-practiced in the act of "ass-covering," particularly at the expense of others.
7. A man or woman who is so morally bankrupt, they are unfit to be a parent.
2. A man or woman who shows an astounding lack of work and personal ethic.
3. A man or woman who shows an irrational fear of participating in any event pertaining to the advancement of the human race. (i.e. Incredibly Lazy)
4. A man or woman who is considered to be an extreme coward.
5. A man or woman who shows a severe allergy towards to truth in any fashion.
6. A man or woman who is well-practiced in the act of "ass-covering," particularly at the expense of others.
7. A man or woman who is so morally bankrupt, they are unfit to be a parent.
1. "Seriously? You don't give a damn whether or not I have a job? You're being a real Feldman right now."
2. You're cutting your shift 3 hours early today? Didn't you show up an hour late too? Geez, you're being a real Feldman today."
3. "Did you see that Feldman today? All he did was sit in the office with his feet up, no shoes, listening to jazz!"
4. "Did you see that coward in 'Band of Brothers'? He was a serious Feldman!"
5. "I've now tried to get a straight answer to my question like 7 times. Quit being a Feldman and just tell the truth!"
6. "Did you hear? My Boss was in today wondering why the reports weren't done for the presentation. That Feldman threw me under the bus to save his own ass!"
7. "I honestly feel that Hitler was too much of a Feldman to be fit for parenthood."
2. You're cutting your shift 3 hours early today? Didn't you show up an hour late too? Geez, you're being a real Feldman today."
3. "Did you see that Feldman today? All he did was sit in the office with his feet up, no shoes, listening to jazz!"
4. "Did you see that coward in 'Band of Brothers'? He was a serious Feldman!"
5. "I've now tried to get a straight answer to my question like 7 times. Quit being a Feldman and just tell the truth!"
6. "Did you hear? My Boss was in today wondering why the reports weren't done for the presentation. That Feldman threw me under the bus to save his own ass!"
7. "I honestly feel that Hitler was too much of a Feldman to be fit for parenthood."
Feldman by PrisonerOfHell April 22, 2009
Related Words
Feldman frotteurism
A specialised form of frotteurism which is performed in art galleries during a busy exhibition. The Feldman frotteur will then scrape his secretions from his y-fronts and add them to his paints. Usually done by aging yellow-haired ex-hippies.
Feldman frotteurism by Colin Cummerbund September 21, 2006
Feldman Equation
A complex formula for determining the optimum level of window-opening required in an office.
x = (3.4 I/T) + (D/3) / WY
x = amount of window-opening required
I = irritation caused to colleagues by window-opening, measured in furyons
D = thickness of denim jacket worn by the window-opener, measured in Status Quos
W = daily amount of non-window-opening work done by window-opener
Y = yellowness of hair of window opener
As W always equals 0 the solution to the equation is always infinity.
x = (3.4 I/T) + (D/3) / WY
x = amount of window-opening required
I = irritation caused to colleagues by window-opening, measured in furyons
D = thickness of denim jacket worn by the window-opener, measured in Status Quos
W = daily amount of non-window-opening work done by window-opener
Y = yellowness of hair of window opener
As W always equals 0 the solution to the equation is always infinity.
Newton: That's what I hate most about Felders. Opening windows willy-nilly.
Hovis: Its not as random as it appears. He can't embark on his window-opening tours without first solving the Feldman Equation.
Hovis: Its not as random as it appears. He can't embark on his window-opening tours without first solving the Feldman Equation.
Feldman Equation by Unnatural England June 29, 2009
Feldman Scheme
A dishonest or disingenuous attempt at using crowdsourcing to extort money from people, especially fans and supporters.
Feldman Scheme by NamesNOTransom June 11, 2018