Fanny Hasbeen 

A term applied to males exhibiting stark changes in behaviour and personality following the introduction of attractive, bow-legged females into their everyday life.

Previous behavioural traits, pre-FH status:
-Emotional unavailability
- Acting cavalier when faced with most females
- Interacting minimally or on a needs only basis
- Frequently sleeping with multiple women simultaneously
- Travelling the world and living a generally high octane lifestyle

New behavioural traits, post-FH status:
- Enjoying the company of one particular female on a consistent basis, coupled by little to no interest in resuming ones formerly cavalier lifestyle
- Spending Friday nights in, deriving pleasure from traditionally middle-aged activities such as wine and/or Marmalade tasting sessions
- Wearing woollen sweaters
- Taking long sleeps, followed by further naps throughout the day

Man 1: Have you seen Rhys lately? Seems like he hasn't been out in a while.
Man 2: Nah man, he's a lost cause. That girl's turned him into a right Fanny Hasbeen.
Man 1: Bummer, was hoping he could sort me guest list to XOYO on Saturday.

Fanny Hasbeen by Hugo Moustachio June 21, 2015