Faecal touch 

The opposite of the 'midas touch'. Rather than everything one touches turning to gold, to have the 'faecal touch' means everything one touches turns to shit.

This can be applied to people who are generally incompetent or just going through a stretch of bad luck.

'How's work going at the moment mate?'

'Just awfully dude, I definitely have the faecal touch. It doesn't matter what I seem to do or how hard I try, everything I am involved with completely fucks up and turns to shit.

Faecal touch by AceDegen July 27, 2010

Fecal Touch 

Characteristic of a person who fucks up everything they get involved with. Often witnessed in the workplace with respect to projects that do not go well.

Boss to employee: I think Johnny has some capacity to assist with the Johnson Project.

Employee: No fucking way- that dude has the fecal touch. Everything he gets involved with turns into a piece of shit- he's a complete brokedick.

Fecal Touch by Steelman7 July 10, 2010