Divorried 

That post-divorce phase where you're past all the bullshit of child support, new spouses, etc. and can stand your ex-spouse again.

I was surprised to see Bill actually talking to Susan in her driveway when he was picking the kids up for the weekend.

That's because Bill and Susan are divorried now.

Divorried by Grant Rampus July 24, 2016

Divorced Barbie 

The Most expensive barbie there is.

Comes with Kens car, Kens house, Ken's computer, and Ken's dog.

Why does the divorced barbie cost $200?!

Divorced Barbie by IntAdd January 6, 2009

divorced dad energy 

An adult male who responds after a divorce usually initiated by the woman, with either a mental or physical crisis resulting in fits of quick anger, moodiness or buying of expensive items to compensate for his insecurity or sadness. He may also try to hit on much younger girls that are out of his league because he is going through a midlife crisis and wants to please his ego

“Hey yo, why did Greg just throw a tantrum when I started talking about Mary and I going out on our 5 year anniversary vacation together?”

“Idk but it’s giving off major divorced dad energy”

divorced dad energy by Bob the KillBillder October 9, 2022

divorced-dad 

Resembling the behavior or stereotypical style of American middle-aged divorced fathers.

"He keeps making dick jokes."
"I know - so divorced-dad."

divorced-dad by FuBug November 2, 2017

divorced parent syndrome 

a fictional disease which is characterized by the following:

1. divorced parents.

2. either an exagerrated innate need to be in a relationship or a laid-back view on relationships and love.

3. repating information or stories because you forgot which parent you told.

4. not telling one parent information or stories because you told the other and forgot.

CHILD: jen's party is tonight!
MOM: you never said that!
CHILD: oh, i must have told dad that. divorced parent syndrome.

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CHILD: jen's party is tonight!
DAD: you already told me that!
CHILD: oh, sorry, i have divorced parent syndrome.

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GIRL: omg my boyfriend just broke up with me.
BOY: hey there girl.
GIRL: omg i'm going to have a crush on you because i have divorced parent syndrome and need to be in a relationship.

divorced parent syndrome by doctor of divorced kids February 7, 2010

Your face's second mother's daughter's great aunt's cousin's divorced wife's baka usagi of a roommate

'Nuff said.

Pretty much the same as your face or your mom. Can be used for any type of situational comeback that you can possibly think of with a touch of...elongated flair.

Person 1: You don't look so good.
Person 2: YOUR FACE'S SECOND MOTHER'S DAUGHTER'S GREAT AUNT'S COUSIN'S DIVORCED WIFE'S BAKA USAGI OF A ROOMMATE DOESN'T LOOK SO GOOD!!!
Person 1: . . . *walks away*

Your face's second mother's daughter's great aunt's cousin's divorced wife's baka usagi of a roommate by RazerRD May 11, 2010

Divorced Dad Bod 

A divorced dad bod has a greater BMI than of a dad bod. One great way to separate the dad bods from the divorced dad bods are visible stretch marks. Since divorced men are huskier and more heavy set, they will typically show stretch marks. But men with divorced dad bod, do not fear, for it is a 2 part transformation. After crushing all the beer and Cheetos in the world,following a divorce your body will blow up, but someday you will have an epiphany. You will dream of 6 pack abs and all the honeys in the world surrounding you at the bar. That is when step 2 of the transformation occurs. You will trade in your beer and Cheetos for a gym membership and whey protein. From there, the rest is history.

Arthur: Dude did you see Mark at our 20 year high school reunion?
Karl: Yeah man, Trixy leaving him and taking the kids really took a toll on him.
Arthur: I know, you could tell he was sporting a serious divorced dad bod.

Divorced Dad Bod by TheRealChickenFucker May 30, 2015